Snakes, Snails and Puppy Dog Tails

Conversations on the way home from school

2012-01-20T16:54:00.000-08:00

On our way home from picking Keegan up from Kindergarten today, I overheard the following conversation taking place in the back of the van:

Keegan: "Camden, it's not nice to play tricks on people. Remember when we were watching He-Man the last day (which is the way he says yesterday), and the guy came on at the end and told us that it's not nice to trick people. So, we shouldn't trick people. And Jesus wouldn't want us to trick people. So I'm following Jesus' instructions, and because you tricked me, you are following Satan's instructions."

I happened to look in my rearview mirror at the point to see Camden's reaction, and he looked so sad, so I asked him what was wrong and he told me that he was bad, because he had been following Satan's instructions when he tricked Keegan. So then we had to have the talk about how he had told Keegan that he was sorry for trying to trick him, which is what Jesus would have wanted him to do (because he had repented) and that he was actually listening to Jesus' instructions too.

Guess some things are sinking in between Primary and reading scriptures each night as a family, and of course, from watching He-Man (which, can I just say, I think it's awesome that my boys love the shows that AJ and I used to watch as kids!).

Man, I love these boys!

Better late than never

2011-11-30T15:37:00.000-08:00

I love getting everyone's Christmas cards in the mail each year. I hang them up on the wall and am reminded of all the people that I love and miss on a daily basis. Usually, I'm just not really good about sending out ones of our own. But, believe it or not, I actually got Christmas cards ordered this year! Guess that's what happens when you have a code for for 50 free photo cards (thank you Pampers Gifts to Grow and Shutterfly). Anyway, check out the posts below to get a sneak preview for those of you that I'm sure are just anxiously awaiting them! ;-)

Photo Card

2011-11-30T15:35:00.001-08:00

World Of Joy Christmas

Create beautiful photo Christmas cards at Shutterfly.com.

View the entire collection of cards.

Photo Card

2011-11-30T15:34:00.001-08:00

Mod Merry Ornaments Christmas

Customize your Christmas cards this year at Shutterfly.com.

View the entire collection of cards.

A Long Time Ago, In A Galaxy Far, Far Away...

2011-11-01T15:24:00.000-07:00

Originally, we weren't going to do costumes this year. And then AJ decided we should, so I spent the better parts of three nights not sleeping and putting together the boys costumes. Keegan insisted on being Obi-Wan Kenobi, Camden had to be Luke Skywalker and we were originally going to make Hunter an Ewok, but by day three of sewing my brain was fried and he ended up just being a little Padawan (that's a Jedi Apprentice to all you non-Star Wars obsessed people). :)
Overall, not bad...and the boys loved them which I guess is the most important thing of all. Next year, we're buying them from the store, I swear. ;)

Brothers

2011-06-11T01:40:00.001-07:00

Hunter, courtesy of both his brothers at this point (I'm pretty sure they were both taking this one but it might have just been Keegan).

Camden, as seen through Keegan's eyes (and the camera lens). I'm amazed at how great this picture is. And this is such a typical Camden pose...I couldn't have planned the shot any better.

Keegan, courtesy of his brother Camden. For a 4 1/2 year old and an almost 3 year old, I really do think this are pretty good pictures. I guess I should let the boys play with the camera more often...I'd probably have a whole lot more photos of all of them.

How Does Your Garden Grow?

2011-05-20T13:38:00.001-07:00

I will be the first to admit that I do not have a green thumb. I tend to kill any plant that crosses my path. Thankfully, I married someone who is VERY handy in many aspects of life, but especially in cultivating a garden. We planted super late last year, so our garden wasn't spectacular, although we did get quite the bumper crop of zucchini, which resulted in many, many loaves of zucchini bread, which we are still enjoying today. This year, we planned ahead and planted much earlier in the season, and AJ did a lot of research on soils and the right mixture to have, etc. and he worked really hard to get everything just right, and it has totally paid off.

We currently have 3 planter boxes full of growing things (AJ made 2 of the planter boxes a couple of years ago out of the railroad ties we already had in the yard and some bricks. See, I told you he was handy to have around!). Our pumpkin has almost completely taken over the garden box it was planted in, but we are super excited, because these are supposed to be the really big pumpkins! We're hoping to have a whole family of jack-o-lanterns come October. There's also asparagus and banana peppers planted in the same box, but the pumpkin is kind of taking over, as you can see.

The next box has our corn, carrots, radishes and something else that I'm forgetting (squash or zucchini, I believe). Our corn is pretty small this year, and we really don't know if we'll get anything but it's fun to watch it grow.

And then there is our last planter box...this was our original garden, and as you can see we have expanded it somewhat, but the plants are all growing magnificently. We have three kinds of tomatoes: roma, beef and cherry (which is pretty funny seeing as how AJ and I can't stand tomatoes for the most part). Then we have sugar peas and snap peas, green, yellow, red and orange bell peppers, more banana peppers and squash and strawberries. Sp far the only ones enjoying our strawberries are the slugs that get to them before we can pick them, but we are hoping to prevent that from happening in the near future.

We didn't get it planted this year, but our 4th planter box will hopefully be an herb garden next year full of mint, basil, oregano, cilantro, chives and who knows what else. I'm really excited to see if I can actually keep things alive and thriving enough to have my own herbs to use.

Our garden has also been an all-you-can-eat diner for the local skunks (thanks to the plentiful grubs found in the soil), and they were digging up the soil and displacing all of our seeds (we had some cantaloupe planted and more squash that ended up not making it thanks to the little stinkers) so AJ managed to fabricate an electric fence that we turned on at night to keep them from getting into the two main planter boxes and it has worked FANTASTICALLY!! Granted, I haven't liked the skunk smell that gets left behind when they get a "little" electric zap, but after three or four times, they haven't returned, and our garden is thriving!!

Now we just have to take care of those slugs...:)

And So It Begins...

2011-03-08T11:06:00.001-08:00

I wasn't able to sign Keegan or Camden up for their gymnastics classes this time around, because they canceled the ones that were on the only days that worked with our schedule, and then we missed signing Keegan up for T-Ball this season (I know, I know...I'm a horrible parent). To be honest, I had no idea when baseball sign-ups were, seeing as how this if the first time EVER that I have even had to think about something like this, but apparently opening weekend was this past weekend, which means that sign-ups were probably weeks, maybe even months, ago. AJ was pretty disappointed, and I have to admit, at first so was I (but just a teensy bit).

And then, while perusing the internet late at night, I thought I would be proactive and check out when I could sign him up for some of the other sports that he is now finally old enough to participate in. I might have missed soccer signups (at least through the rec centers, it seems, but maybe not through AYSO), and we aren't pushing any of the kids to play football, and the boys don't seem to have a ton of interest in playing basketball...so I thought we were out of luck, and then I remembered a sport that someone had mentioned to us about 6 months ago, that is perfect for Keegan.

Enter
We have officially signed Keegan up to play water polo (or at least the non-contact version that introduces the sport to the kids) and now my Tuesday and Thursday afternoons from 3:30 - 4:30 are no longer my own (although it's not like they ever really were...but it's even less so now). At least I get to spend the time hanging out by a pool, which is never a bad thing, right?

2011 Challenge #3

2011-03-07T12:37:00.000-08:00

So here's the thing...I vaguely remember that at one point in my life I was actually thin. For anyone that has only known me in the past few years, they will probably find that statement really hard to believe, but I swear, that at one point in my life I actually looked good (ok, fine, pretty decent), and I really did fit into the size 2 jeans that are currently residing (read: collecting dust) at the bottom of my closet.

If you don't believe me, here's the proof:

See, my stomach was actually flat, my arms weren't flabby, and I didn't have a "muffin-top" that hung over the top of my jeans, and there was no double chin (and I was actually tan...but that's a whole other issue). Having 3 kids in a 3 1/2 year time frame (and gaining way more weight than I should have with Keegan and then not losing all of it before I had Camden and not being good about exercising before/during/after/ever) changed all of that (meaning my once thin body) for the worse.

However, this year is the year that I am changing that (beacause really, I am the only one who is to blame here and I am the only one who can change it...there is no magical weight-loss fairy who can zap me with her wand and magically give me back my 21-year-old body again, but oh if only there was one!). When I finally reach my goal, I will actually be able to look at myself in the mirror and recognize the person that is looking back at me. And believe me...actually losing the weight is going to be a daily challenge/struggle, but it's one that I am definitely up for (because honestly the almost daily query of when my next one is due, and if this one is actually a girl is getting a little old people).

So, here's to the new year...and a new, and thinner, me.

Now, who wants to tell me what's worked for them? :)

2011 Challenge #2

2011-01-20T14:16:00.000-08:00

In keeping with challenging myself, I promised myself that I would try new things. I'm not great at sewing, by any means, but I try. I've just realized that I'm not a patient person when it comes to sewing, but I'm working on improving that.

I've made some blankets, and some things for the boys and even a few things for myself, but I wanted to try and make a quilt for a good friend of ours who works with AJ and who just recently had their first baby, a little girl. Only having boys so far, I was in love with all the pinks that I got to work with to make this quilt. It's a really simple pattern, and I just did a straight-line quilting on it (no stippling or any other pattern for me just yet), but I love the final result. Hopefully the recipients were just as happy with it.

It went together fairly quickly, and I only had to unpick a few rows toward the end when my impatience got the best of me (lesson learned, seriously). My fingers have never been so numb as they were after hand sewing the binding on, but I'm pretty proud of what I accomplished and think that it looks pretty decent (not that I'm trying to toot my own horn...I just want to make sure I remember how I felt about the whole process years down the road).

Now I just need to get working on quilt #2 so I don't lose my momentum...maybe, someday I'll get good enough that I can sell them and turn it into a little bit of a side business. :)

Bring It On 2011

2011-01-12T13:18:00.000-08:00

So, I know that January is halfway over, and I realize that I'm a little late with posting about resolutions, but better late than never, right?

I've decided that 2011 is going to be the year for stepping outside of my comfort zone. I'm trying to find that balance in life of who I am as a wife and a mother and as me. Sometimes I feel like the "me" part gets lost in all of the other stuff. That's not to say that I don't love being a wife and a mom, because I do. I LOVE this time in my life right now, but I don't want to wake up in 20 years and wonder who is staring back at me in the mirror, you know?

I didn't really make a lot of resolutions for the new year...I really just sort of made one really big one. I've resolved to challenge myself daily, whether it's to try new things, to not be afraid or to stop making excuses.

With that being said, my first challenge of the year came from my sister, Val. A while ago, last year, we had talked about running a 5K together. No big deal...just 3.1 miles. Easy, peasy, right? Except that we never managed to sign up for one and do it together and life got in the way and just kept right on going. And then came the challenge for this year...forget the 5K and let's go for a 1/2 marathon. That's right...13.1 miles. Further than I have ever run in my life at one time (and sometimes further than I have ever run in a week, and sometimes a month). I'm not a runner...I don't love it. It's hard to do and it's brutal to me and my body (and to be honest, my mind at times because it really gives me too much time to think and that's not always a good thing). For whatever inexplicable reason, I said "OK" and she held me to it...and we signed up for the SLC 1/2 Marathon on April 16th. And then we got Cynthia to sign up and run it with us and hang out with us in our insanity. Why? Because this is the year of no excuses. Of challenging myself every day (and trying to stick to any sort of training program with 3 kids is a daily challenge).

So, to those 13.1 miles, I say "bring it on". I will conquer you, and I will survive it (and maybe even run another one depending on how this one goes). Why not, right?

'Tis the Season

2010-12-07T23:27:00.000-08:00

The boys and I have been trying to stay busy while AJ has been gone on his latest trip. We decided to go and see the lights at the temple on Monday night for our FHE, and while they aren't even remotely close to the lights at Temple Square, the boys and I fully enjoyed seeing the lights on the temple grounds (with the added bonus being that I was walking around in sandals still, and the boys only needed sweatshirts...definitely wouldn't have happened if we had been at Temple Square!)

These three little boys are the best gifts that I have ever been given. They are such a joy and delight in my life. I love the laughter and energy that they bring into our home. It's amazing to me, in looking at all of them in that picture, how alike they all are and yet how you can still see their own individuality as well. Camden loved the nativity sets (there are two...I didn't get pictures of one of them), and he had to make sure that he petted each and every animal before we could leave. As we were driving up to the temple, Keegan asked me if AJ and I were going to get married there again. I guess he hasn't quite fully grasped the concept of eternal marriage just yet, but at least he knows that the temple is where his mom and dad were married, and that is where he will be married as well once he is older. Then he wanted to know if I had thanked everyone who was at the temple the day I got married, and wanted to know if I had made sure I gave loves and blew kisses before I left the temple after getting married (he's very into making sure I say "thank you" for everything...I guess I must be over stressing the need to have manners with the boys). He cracks me up. I really should start carrying around a tape recorder with me to capture all the things that he says, and the way that he says them.

Halfway There...

2010-12-07T19:37:00.001-08:00

I can't believe that Hunter is already 6 months old. It does not seem possible to me. It seems like you wait forever for them to be born, and then in the blink of an eye they aren't little babies anymore. He is so different from Keegan and Camden, and it some ways that has made things easier and in some ways it has been harder. He is definitely my linebacker of the bunch...he weighs more at 6 months than Keegan did at nine months and Camden did at a year. He is my little chunky-monkey and I love it! What can I say, the kid likes to eat. When I was finally ready to start him on solids (he was ready at about 5 months, I held out until he turned 6 months) he was practically grabbing the spoon out of my hand and trying to help me get it into his mouth. Now, as soon as I sit him in his seat and he sees me mixing up his cereal his legs and arms start moving every which way and he doesn't stop until he is full. I'm still only feeding him once a day with cereal and fruits, but my pediatrician gave me the go ahead to start feeding him all varieties of food, and said I could bump it up to more than just once a day (personally I think Hunter paid him off to say that, but I can't prove it). I'm trying to make him his baby food (like I did with Camden) so we'll see if I can keep up with his demand once he starts eating solids more than once a day.

Hunter is rolling EVERYWHERE...although he has learned that rolling onto the kitchen floor isn't nearly as soft as staying on the carpet. He's sitting up on his own, most of the time, although he prefers to be on his back and belly because he can roll anywhere he wants, and he just started army crawling a few days ago. I have a feeling that Keegan and Camden will be learning very quickly that if they don't want Hunter to have a certain toy than they are going to have to pick it up and keep it out of his reach. He got his first tooth the day after Thanksgiving, and I have a feeling a second one is about to join it. Thankfully, he's been a pretty easy teether. His first one finally cut through during his afternoon nap and he didn't even make a peep.

Some of Hunter's Favorite things at 6 months:

1. His brothers - he thinks that Keegan and Camden are there solely for his entertainment and his entertainment alone. Keegan, especially (and Keegan loves having an adoring audience). His face lights up when he sees them and no matter where he is, if he hears his brothers he stops what he is doing and looks for them.

2. Hunter loves when Keegan "helps" him roll over. They do this almost every night after their bath. Hunter is usually on the floor on his back while I help Camden get dressed, and Keegan will go up to him and use his head to push against Hunter's side to "help" him roll over. They both end up laughing the whole time. I really should get video because the description does not do it justice.

3. His toes...he tries to get them in his mouth at every possible chance.

4. Scratching at things to see what noise it will make. He does this all the time...when I'm burping him, when he's sitting on someones lap, on the floor, anywhere. He especially loves the office chair and the sound it makes.

5. Being carried. Hunter does NOT like the stroller...mostly because he really doesn't get to spend that much time in it (or at least he didn't until recently). At 20 pounds, however, he's just way too heavy for me to carry everywhere, so he is learning to tolerate the stroller, and Keegan is learning to not be in it anymore (I think he likes the freedom).

6. His snuggles (blanket). No matter how asleep he might be when I lay him down for his nap, 99% of the time he will kick his feet up in the air until I put his blanket on him, then roll to the side and pull it up to his face and then stick his thumb in his mouth (yeah, he's my thumbsucker...although it's not all of the time, so I don't think we'll have a hard time breaking him of the habit). He loves having a soft blanket (or stuffed animal in a pinch) against his face when he first goes to sleep. It's so cute.

7. The sounds he can make with his tongue (he loves to click it against the roof of his mouth) and the sound of his voice. I love his little babbling as well.

Happy Halloween

2010-11-02T13:35:00.001-07:00

My little cast of characters....

Hunter, the ferocious(ly drooly) lion

Camden, the ever reluctant superhero (he does not like dress-up of any kind...apparently AJ was the same way when he was little...you would have thought we were torturing the kid when we put on his costume...although he was just fine once it was all the way on)

and Keegan...the only one who willingly put on his costume (even though it's a very generic, homemade version of a spiderman costume...because to be honest, I wasn't going for spiderman, I was just going for generic superhero but he insisted the he was going to be spiderman, hence the very late addition of a spider to his costume and the wrong color "boots").

I swear that I will never make another costume again...these just about did me in (although I think I remember telling myself the same thing last year too, which obviously didn't stick). Hunter's was the only one I really had no part in. It's Camden's costume from two years ago...and it was lovingly made by my mom (although I did provide the fabric and do the ribbon mane). I don't know how she did it making costumes for all of us kids growing up. Maybe it's because I'm such an impatient sewer (something I'm working on)...or maybe I was just tired and mad at myself for putting this off until the last minute (kind of like last years pirate costumes), but dragging 3 kids to the fabric store was just something I couldn't get excited about, so I kept putting it off in the hopes that I would have a chance to go on my own, and it never happened and I ended up with all 3 of them at the store with me anyway...a week before Halloween, with about 30 of my closest "friends", all doing the same last minute costume sewing that I was. I guess, in the end, all that matters, though is that they got done, and my boys had costumes and they seemed to be just fine with them.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Keegan and Camden's jack-o-lantern's that they helped their daddy carve.

Conversations With a 3-year-old

2010-10-20T00:11:00.000-07:00

I had the best exchange with Keegan tonight. It went a little like this.

K: Mom, what you doing?
Me: Making some cookies.
K:Oh. Cookies for me?
Me: For all of us.
K: My have one now?
Me:Not yet, bud, they still have to bake. You can have one after you finish your soup (corn chowder) and have a bath.
K: Oh. My not want any more soup. My all fulled up to here (as he does the sign for "full").
Me: Oh, you're all filled up, huh?
K: Well, my not all filled up yet (he so knew that I was going to say that he must be too full for cookies if he was too full for more soup...it's like he's inside my head or something. Or maybe we just have that conversation a lot because he always seems to have room for treats but never room for his regular food). My still have some room for my cookie. See, right here on my side (as he shows me the exact spot on his side where he still has a little room left). This where my cookie go. My just have no more room for soup.

To be fair, he had already eaten most of his soup and his sandwich, so it's not like he was just going to have cookies for dinner, so he probably was "all fulled up". You gotta love the kid, and his reasoning though. He so takes after me. Even at the age of three he knows that there is always room for some dessert.

Super Boys to the Rescue

2010-10-19T00:22:00.000-07:00

Keegan has been asking me to make him a super hero cape for quite some time, and I had found a free pattern online (so great, I know, right? I love that it's reversible...and free) but I've kind of been putting it off, because I really don't feel all that confident in my sewing abilities. I finally bit the bullet a few weeks back and made a cape for Keegan and then another for Camden. The fact that Keegan has worn it for some portion of the day, everyday since it has been finished definitely made the effort worth it. Camden is still a little hesitant to put his on (which shouldn't surprise me seeing as how he cried for about 20 min. the other day when we dressed him up in his pirate costume from last year to go trick-or-treating at Sea World) but I'm hoping that eventually he will warm up to the idea of wearing it.

All in all, they didn't turn out too bad. It's a little long, but that just means he can grow into it. I've never embroidered anything on before, and you can tell when you give it more than just a cursory glance, but Keegan is totally happy with his (especially since it was made in the colors that he wanted it to be), and it's something that I made for him...and I love that he runs up and down the hall and all over our backyard using his "superpowers" to rescue and protect people. Now I just have to convince him that a generic superhero costume will be good enough for Halloween rather than the Spiderman one that he seems to want. It might take more superpowers than I currently have at my disposal to accomplish that task! :)

Frog Princes...

2010-10-18T23:59:00.001-07:00

So, I found this great free tutorial/pattern for a beanbag frog when I was first looking for and making beanbags for the boys that spell out their names (and help with letter recognition....which has been great). My goal for the original beanbags was to have one full set with the entire alphabet and then each of the boys having their own name spelled out as well...eventually, I'll get the whole alphabet done, but for now Keegan and Camden are the only ones that are done. Hunter's is a work in progress (although at least I have all of the squares cut out...they just have to be sewn together now, the letters need to be painted on and they need to be filled....all in my spare time, which naturally I have a ton of). ** Side note, I love when people are willing to share their creative energies for free with those of us that are less creative.

Anyway, I needed a break from sewing a gazillion blankets (at least that's what it feels like...we have a ton of pregnant ladies in our ward right now) and I was looking for a little gift to make and give to the older son of some friends of ours who just had another baby boy (I feel like the older kids sometimes get left out and I didn't want him to feel neglected) so I used some scrap fabric and put one together, just to get a feel for how it would turn out. It goes together super fast, which is great, and turned out pretty cute. Of course, as soon as Keegan saw the one I was making for our friends son, and wanted to play with it and then asked for one of his own when I informed him that it wasn't for him. Of course, once he had his, Camden needed one too, so a third one was made. I think it's a good thing that Hunter isn't talking just yet, although it's probably inevitable that he will get one of his own as well.

The one with the crown is the one being given as the gift (although Keegan informed me today that his frog needed a crown as well so I guess I better get on that) and then Keegan's and Camden's are on the sides. Not too bad for a few hours work, if I do say so myself (and I already had everything I needed so in a way, it was free, which is even better). And of course, no post is complete without a picture of my very own little princes! :)

She's Crafty....

2010-10-18T23:50:00.000-07:00

Every once in a while I get inspired to make stuff and I actually end up following through with it. While I'm not great at it (like my sister) I'm ok...and thankfully my boys aren't too picky about crooked seams and poorly hand sewn items.

Here's a little preview of what I've been up too...

Our Utah Trek

2010-08-31T16:49:00.000-07:00

AJ has to retake his boards in a couple of weeks (he has to retake them every 6 years), so in order to give him a little peace and quiet in order to get some really good study time in, I decided to head to Utah to see my family, because it had been way too long since we've been together. We were originally supposed to go up the first week of August, but Keegan and Camden both got sick, so we had to postpone our little excursion until just this past week. My mom came with us (thankfully), and it was a wonderful week of fun in Utah. All three of the boys did great on the drives up and back, so great in fact that I'm more than willing to do the trip again soon. (Utah, you've been warned)! ;) Other than a few minor moments and meltdowns (Keegan really, really missed his dad and wanted to go home every night, especially after we said our prayers in which we asked that our Daddy be watched over while we were away), it was a great time spent with my siblings and my mom and the boys with their cousins. They got their fill of bounce houses, and dinosaurs and pioneer heritage and just plain old hanging out with family fun. We got to ride trains and see Temple Square and enjoy a typical Utah summer storm (for the 5 minutes that it lasted).

We can't wait to go back!

Two at the Zoo

2010-08-31T13:23:00.000-07:00

Time for catching up again, and I can't think of a better way to start than with Camden's birthday. I can't believe the little man is already TWO. For his birthday, we decided to go to quite possibly his favorite place on earth, the zoo. He seriously asks me daily if we can go and see the animals, so it was the best choice. Plus, we got to see some old friends while we were there, which made for fun times all around (the best part for Camden was that it was the second time in the same week that he was able to go to the zoo, and since we went later in the day, AJ got to join us, which is a rare thing indeed). We got to see all of his favorite animals, including the giraffe that he shares a birthday with, as well as some that we don't normally get to see. Since we took his cupcakes into the zoo, there weren't any candles for him to blow out, but he didn't seem to mind so much.

(hanging out at the zoo on his birthday)

Camden is my very stubborn, willful child (and I know that he comes by it honestly), and I have a feeling that he is going to be quite a challenge for me as he grows older. He is exasperating and exhausting and challenging and yet he's also my happy, loving child, who is more than willing at anytime to give loves and kisses. He is smart and he loves to be read to (and he'll "read" on his own), and he is strong and loves to be outside and loves, I mean LOVES, animals. He talks, but not a lot, although he is getting to be more and more talkative each and every day (when you have an older brother like Keegan who talks constantly from the moment he wakes up to the moment he goes to sleep it's sometimes hard to get a word in edgewise, but Camden is slowly learning to hold his own). He has a love of "Cars" and trucks and anything that goes, and has learned to love "Woody" and "Boo" (Buzz Lightyear) and "Eroes" (Superheroes) because it's what his older brother loves as well. He loves his Dad and he loves Keegan. If he wakes up in the morning and Keegan is already out of bed, he comes into my room and asks where "Ne Ne" (how he says Keegan) is. Once he knows where to find his older brother, his day can begin. He also spends a lot of time during the day asking me where "Dad go?" and repeating that he's at work when I tell him where AJ is. He is learning to tolerate his little brother, and is more than willing to tell me when Hunter is crying or upset, and he always makes sure that Hunter is in the car when we go anywhere before he will let me put on his seat belt. He is Grandma's little buddy (as our recent trip to Utah reaffirmed). He is fearless, and willing to try anything that he sees Keegan doing, like jumping into our friends pool from their spa (which is higher up than the pool), without checking to see if Dad is there to catch him first (thankfully, AJ was and he survived to do it again and again and again). He doesn't like to do anything he doesn't want to do, and doesn't always listen as well as we like him too, but once he sets his mind to do something, he'll do it without being asked again. His laugh is so contagious, and I love hearing him laugh and giggle with Keegan as they play whatever game they are playing. He has a great imagination that he expresses in his own little way, and I can't wait until he is able to vocalize it a little more. He is so opposite of what we were used to with Keegan, and yet I wouldn't have him any other way. I love him just the way he is.

(showing me just how unhappy he was about something...a common look most days and then happy as can be just a little while later)

Happy 2nd Birthday, Camden Man! Here's to many more years of laughter and loves.

"Lost in the circle, beautiful circle, wonderful circle of love"

2010-08-02T12:43:00.001-07:00

Sorry for my absence of late. I've been busy taking care of the three greatest little boys in the world. My days are full...sometimes, I'm not sure with what, and I find myself completely exhausted at the end of each day, but I am loving being a mom. Especially because I am a mom to these guys. I love my life.

Total Randomness...

2010-06-21T17:06:00.000-07:00

apparently the housing market in San Diego is better than I thought, because even if your house isn't for sale, people are willing to buy it.

AJ and I got a letter in the mail the other day (just addressed to AJ, really, but since I live here too, it was also meant for me) from someone who said that she and her husband wanted to buy our house and that if we were willing to sell it to contact them. Hello, random, right? I mean, it's not like our house is on a busy street, where there is alot of traffic, so a lot of people see it, etc. We are at the end of a cul-de-sac...kind of out of the way. And it's not like we have a "for sale" sign in front of our house, or that we've contacted a realtor. Heck, it's not like we've even considered selling it...so why would someone just send a letter to us? Especially since there are actually 3 or 4 houses just down the street from us that are for sale.

Hmmm...I wonder if that means we just get to name our price too? :)

Hi, My Name is Hunter...

2010-06-21T16:58:00.000-07:00

and I'm a milk-a-holic.

I still can't believe that it's been a month already. And I really can't believe that Hunter is as big as he is. He had his 1-month checkup today and he already weighs 12 lbs. 5.8 oz. REALLY?? And here I was thinking how small he seemed to me (and I guess in comparison to his brothers, he still is small...and yet, oh so big). Most importantly of all, I'm just grateful for how healthy he is...and how happy. For the most part he really is the eaisest baby (although we are still working on getting our days and nights figured out...right now his "day" starts at about 4:30 a.m. which is so not fun for me, or AJ, for that matter).

It's nice to have him here...and to have some of my fears and concerns just melt away. Keegan and Camden have been great with Hunter. They are so gentle and careful with him, and totally look out for him (the concerned look on Camden's face when Hunter starts to fuss is pretty stinking cute). For the most part, they just kind of ignore him...or just play around him, and thankfully there have been no jealousy issues. It's amazing how a heart can expand it's capacity to love...even when you think that it's just not possible.

Fear and Self-Loathing at 38 Weeks

2010-05-18T23:09:00.000-07:00

WARNING: Super personal post ahead, so feel free to pass it up if you aren't in the mood to read it.

So, remember the episode of "The Office" where Pam and Jim are going to have their baby and Pam's obviously very much in labor, but she keeps putting off going to the hospital because she says that she wants that extra day in the hospital, although in reality it's really because she is scared that she can't do it?

Well lately, I've been channeling my inner-Pam, which would be fine and all if this was my first child, but somehow the fact that it's my third makes me feel really pathetic. I'm seriously scared out of my mind that I'm not going to be able to handle having a third baby, especially since it means that I will be the mother of 3 kids, aged 3 1/2 and under. I wonder if it really is true that it's going to take at least 6 months for me to even begin to feel normal. I wonder how long it will take for me to get up the courage to attempt to take all three of the boys out of the house at once (and if I will ever feel fully comfortable doing it before this baby is older than 1). I wonder how I'm going to manage holding Keegan's hand, and Camden's hand and hold a baby all at once while walking into a store, or crossing a street, or going anywhere period. I wonder if I'm going to be able to deal with preschool at my house again when it's my turn in the rotation to teach. I worry about how Keegan and Camden are going to react to him, and I worry about how much they might have to sacrifice over the next few months, and I hope and pray daily that they won't resent me or their little brother for it. I worry that I won't be able to show them how much I love all of them, and how that won't change even with a new little baby in our family. I worry about my ability to raise my boys right, so that they will add something amazing to my life and to the lives of whomever they might come in contact with. I worry about the fact that AJ and I will have even less time together than we already do, and I hope that it doesn't destroy or severely damage our relationship, and that the toll that it will take is something that we can get through and that we will be stronger for it on the other side. I worry about the stress that being the sole provider puts on AJ and I wonder how best to help ease it.

With Keegan I was so ready for him to just get here already, and be born, and it was hard having my doctor tell me that he wouldn't induce me (especially since it was my first) and it was hard having to go the 2 days past my due date that I had to before I went into labor with Keegan . With Camden, we scheduled the induction, because we wanted to make sure that my doctor was the one that delivered him, especially since she already knew all the history of what we were dealing with in regards to his lung, and we knew that he would be a bigger baby and then the little stinker decided to come the day before I was scheduled to be induced. This time around, I'm more than willing to just let this little boy come when he's ready, despite the fact that the longer he waits the bigger he will be, and despite the fact that I'm uncomfortable and physically done with being pregnant. It's not that I'm not ready to meet him, because I totally am. I can't wait to see if he looks like his brothers, or if he will look completely different. I'm ready to see what kind of personality he is going to have, especially since Keegan and Camden are total opposites in so many ways. I can't wait to see him and know what his name is. I can't wait to hold him, and love him and enjoy all of those amazing (albeit sleep-deprived) newborn moments that are so amazingly special, and yet, I still turned down my doctor's offer to induce me this Sunday, knowing that the next possible date for her to induce me after that won't be until after my due date, because I'm ready, and yet, I'm not, and I'm not really sure if there is any way to ever be fully ready for something like this, and I hate it.

I hate that I don't fully trust in myself, and in my ability to adapt and to expand, and to manage and to be a mother, which I know, without a doubt in my mind and heart, is what I was ultimately meant to do in this life. This is the path that I have chosen, and this is a decision that AJ and I made together, knowing what the challenges and trials and struggles might be, and now suddenly I have lost all confidence in myself and in that decision. I hate that I am so scared and so insecure about my abilities when I have family and friends that are struggling with so much more and who are doing it with such grace and confidence and strength.

Sometimes, human frailties suck.

Brothers...

2010-03-24T22:51:00.000-07:00

I love the relationship that Keegan and Camden have developed. It's so much fun to listen to Keegan help Camden, to hear him ask "what you need Camden" or "it's alright, you okay, mom will be here any second". He always makes sure to look out for Camden. It's a blast watching Camden observe everything that Keegan does and then try and do the same thing. He truly admires and worships his older brother, and both boys make sure that if one of them gets a treat the other one gets one as well. I love that they are totally content having each other as play buddies, and that hugs inevitably turn into wrestling matches, and that walks around the neighborhood turn into races up and down our street. They don't always get along, but the love that they have for each other is pretty evident, especially at night, as they are going to bed and blowing kisses to each other. I found a quote a while back, and it seems perfect for my boys:

"Sometimes being a brother is even better than being a superhero"

Catching Up...

2010-03-24T21:52:00.000-07:00

So I realize how far behind I am with these posts, but I felt like I needed to catch up a little on what we've been doing. Keegan celebrated his 3rd birthday back in January. I still can't believe that he's already 3 (and that we've been in our house for just over 3 years now...time really needs to slow down a little). His birthday was a really low-key affair, but he didn't seem to notice or even really care, thankfully.

By far, Keegan's favorite present was his "big boy" bike that he received. The best part for us was the fact that we inherited it from some friends....SCORE (just don't tell Keegan). Most nights before dinner are now spent racing (and I'm not exaggerating on that last part) around our neighborhood. I'm usually still here at the house getting dinner ready, and I always know when Keegan is home because he rings his little bike bell as he comes up the driveway and then comes into the house and let's me know that his dad is a "slowpoke" and that Keegan is "the winner" and "superfast". I personally think it's the cutest thing in the world.

I can't believe how quickly he is growing up...he amazes me and entertains me on a daily basis. Seriously, this kid rocks. He's become such a big helper around the house, especially when AJ has had to leave for his trips around the world. The best way to get him to do anything is to tell him that you need his "big boy help" and he's all over whatever you've just asked him to do. He's totally his "dad's little buddy" and such a great big brother to Camden (I can't wait to see how he is with the next little one in a couple of months). He's so vocal and friendly with everyone, and I love it. He loves singing songs and we pretty much don't even listen to the radio anymore in the car. He still loves his race cars and catching bad guys and being a super hero and telling me that I get to decide what he wants to eat because he's "too busy". He started a gymnastics class a few weeks back, and while the first few weeks were rough and he had no desire to go back, at all, we stuck it out and now it's one of his favorite things to do. He loves going and getting his stamps at the end and doing all the jumps and exercises and things that he has learned (and he is more than willing to give anyone who will watch a demonstration of all the things he has learned to do). Curbs are no longer curbs, they are balance beams, and he has to walk on all of them "just like an airplane" with his arms stuck out wide. He has his favorite things...like the lions at the zoo, his yellow construction shirt with the buildings on it, jeans instead of shorts most days and his blue "gun" hat, and has certain things that almost always have to go with us wherever we go (which can be rough and delay us when he can't remember where he's left things), but he is the greatest little 3-year old. He melts my heart everytime he snuggles up to me on the couch at the end of the day as we read our books and tells me "mom, you my best friend." It's kind of selfish, but the only thing that I love about when AJ is gone is the fact that I get 100% of Keegan's snuggles and loves and hugs. I love that he wants me to lay down and take a nap with him in the afternoons, and that he'll close my eyes with his hands and tell me that I need to rest. I love hearing him fake snore when he's having competitions with AJ as to who can fall asleep faster for their Sunday afternoon naps, but most of all, I love having the privilege of raising this amazing little guy.

Ok..enough words...here are some recent pictures:

Updates are coming...

2010-02-03T23:05:00.000-08:00

I promise. Things have happened in our household, like Christmas and a 3rd birthday and fun trips to the zoo and the park...and I have pictures to prove it. Unfortunately, I also have a really slow computer and a husband who is gone once again (he swears he's retiring from the full-time Rugby travel circuit, but I'm pretty sure he's just saying that to appease me). Don't give up on me (please, oh please, oh please, family of mine). I promise, I'll get myself together one of these days and get updates on our lives put on the blog. Just bear with me a little bit longer.

It's A......

2010-01-11T12:14:00.000-08:00

babybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabyBOYbabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybaybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabybabyba

Don't You Hate It When...

2009-12-15T15:09:00.000-08:00

you let your own fears and insecurities stop you from possibly getting something that you might love?

Backstory...I was sitting at the lab waiting to get some bloodwork done (standard pregnancy stuff, no biggie) and I saw a lady with a fantastic bag (one that could also double as a pretty chic diaper bag if needed). It was orange, and leather-ish (it could have been real because I was in La Jolla after all, but it might have been synthetic) and was just perfect. I was coveting it...I could even picture myself carrying it. I should have stopped and asked her where she got it, but I didn't. Why? Because I was worried that she would think me too weird or too forward or psycho, so I kept my trap shut. Instead, I've spent the last 45 minutes on the internet googling as much as I could to try and find a similar bag, all to no avail. I do this all the time...and I kick myself every time it happens. I see someone wearing a cute top, or a cute dress or a cute pair of shoes and I don't ask. Grrrr...curse my insecurities.

Anyone else do this, or am I the sole, lame, tongue-tied person secretly coveting what others have rather than just asking and possibly getting it for myself?

Mama's Holiday Wishlist

2009-12-09T19:28:00.000-08:00

Mama’s Holiday Wish List Meme

TodaysMama and Provo Craft are giving away a sleighful of gifts this holiday season and to enter I’m sharing this meme with you.

1. What 5 items are on your holiday wish list this year?

new digital camera
a bigger car (although this is soon to be more of a necessity and less of a wish since my current car won't hold 3 carseats)
the beaba babycook baby food maker (I murdered my blender last year making camden's food and this would just be so handy)
a finished master bathroom
wood floors/new carpet in the appropriate areas of my house (I can really dream about this one)

2. What is your favorite handmade gift you have received?

two favorites are the handmade ornaments that AJ's grandma makes for us each year with pictures of the boys in them (and all the ones from AJ growing up),and the blankets that my mom has made for my boys

3. What handmade gift have you always wanted to tackle?

there are way too many on my list, like making an advent calendar for my kids, felt food for my kids, a tree house/clubhouse for the boys, and lots of home improvement ones

4. What was the best Christmas gift you received as a child?

the Cabbage Patch dolls that we all got one year (our cousins included). I remember how the adults walked each of us into the room one at a time and gave us the coveted doll.

5. What items are on your kid’s wish list this year?

Keegan just informed me today that he wants a dinosaur book, but other than that, he hasn't said much. He's pretty chill. Camden probably just wants whatever Keegan gets, so it makes things pretty easy. I'm sure the lists will grow as they get older.

6. What is your favorite holiday food?

My grandma's rolls with homemade strawberry jam, ham, and scalloped potatoes and peppermint ice cream (that really probably should have been first...I buy way too much of it the moment it becomes available in the stores).

7. What will you be hand-crafting for the holidays?

some gifts for the boys, homemade soap for Keegan's friends and a couple of things for family that I can't really share

8. What is your favorite holiday movie?

I can't say that I have one, I'm horrible, I know, but I do like "Miracle on 34th Street" (the newer version)

9. Favorite holiday song?

"O Holy Night" by Martina McBride and "Song for a Winter's Night" by Sarah McLachlan and my boys Christmas Lullabies CD (although it gets played year round at our house)

10. Favorite holiday pastime?

looking at all of the Christmas lights, curling up with a good book and peppermint hot chocolate (Stephen's is the best), making sugar cookies with the kids, decorating our tree and the rest of the house and just having the extra time with my hubby

To enter to win all these cool prizes below simply answer the questions in this meme, make sure to post links back to TodaysMama.com and Provo Craft (use this link: http://bit.ly/4ikY3c ) and tag your friends!

Tag you're it!

Steph, Mary, Jennette, my siblings (I won't double tag, but I do want to know your answers) and anyone else inspired to share what's on their wish list.

This is why....

2009-12-04T23:05:00.000-08:00

a ladies night out was exactly what I needed. I got to see "New Moon" (c'mon, give me a break...I never saw "Twilight" in the theatres and I know there is no way that AJ will watch this with me, so I had to take the opportunity to see it when I could, and I don't regret it. I liked it...it was good...and it made me fall a little bit in love with Jacob. What more can I say?).

Anyway, I digress...because not only did I get to enjoy some adult-time (which was fabulous and very much needed right now), but I also got to catch up a little on my up-coming movies (my pocketbook will not be thanking me later).

Like this one:

(seriously, I "heart" Kirsten Bell...especially as Veronica Mars, but this role just might do nicely)

and this one:

starring Amanda Seyfried, whom I first liked as Lily in "Veronica Mars" (do I need to tell you how much I loved that show?), but who I really started to admire in "Mamma Mia" (yes, I've watched that movie, and yes, more than once...Pierce Brosnan singing is highly entertaining, and I like Abba, what can I say...plus, I saw the show when it was in Vegas so I of course had to see the movie).

I'm pretty sure that this just means that I'm still a 15-year-old girl trapped in a 32-year-old's body (I did like "New Moon" afterall). Oh well! So, who's in the mood for a movie? I'll bring the popcorn and treats.

Dear Life...

2009-11-12T13:22:00.000-08:00

Dear Chick-Fil-A,

Thanks for bringing back your Peppermint Chocolate Chip milkshake. I've been thinking about it since the last time I had one last year, so I'm glad that it's finally back. It made my not-always-happy-with-food belly quite happy with you. I have a feeling I will be consuming lots of you during your "limited edition flavor" offerings (much to the detriment of my goal for a reasonable pregnancy weight gain).

Dear Little Baby,

Time to let your mom not be sick in the mornings, ok? and in the afternoons and the evenings. And especially no more of this "let's feel great for days and then WHAM...get hit by the mack truck of morning sickness". It's time to move on from all of this and get on to the good stuff about pregnancy...you know, insomnia, heartburn, weight gain. Hmmmm, maybe I need to rethink my stand on morning/afternoon/evening/all hours of the day and night sickness?

Dear Anything and Everything Peppermint,
Thanks for making things a little easier on me right now. The smell of you can get rid of any other smell in the house, and the taste of you helps calm a very unhappy belly. Good thing it's winter and the smell of peppermint isn't a novelty.

Dear Brach's,
I'm so looking forward to consuming large quantities of your wonderful green and red holiday mints this year, so please make sure that they are available in abundance at all of my local retailers (and not just one store, in a limited quantity like previous years). As a side note to all my friends and family who read this, if you come across some, please feel free to let me know where so that I can purchase them or feel free to pick some up for me and I will pay you for your troubles.

Green with Envy...

2009-11-12T12:43:00.000-08:00

In December, AJ gets to go here:
(Dubai)

and here:
(South Africa)

He's traveling with the USA Rugby 7's team, and I'm officially jealous. It was bad enough when he got to go to Hong Kong, and then to England and to Australia, but now....DUBAI and SOUTH AFRICA...seriously, I'm so green I could give Elphaba a run for her money (and you'll only understand that if you've read and/or seen "Wicked").

I wonder if there is a suitcase big enough for him to stow me away in?

Arrrrgh, it's Halloween...

2009-11-12T12:21:00.001-08:00

I know, I know, I'm a little behind on things.

Keegan and Camden were pirates this year (I was simply the mom who was stressed because she waited until the last minute to finish the boys costumes). It was pretty funny watching Camden chase after people with his sword raised in the air. If you ask Keegan what a pirate says, his response is usually "Arrrrgh", although you will get the occasional "walk the plank" and "hands in the air" as he points his sword at you. We went to Sea World the week before Halloween and did a little trick-or-treating there, but it was a little too crowded for us, and the boys wanted to see the animals more than anything. Our ward had their Halloween party on the 31st, so we went to that. Keegan loved going from car to car saying "Trick-or-Treat" and then saying "thank you" after (finally some lessons are paying off). The best was, there was a guy passing out apples instead of candy at his car. It was the only thing that both Keegan and Camden were interested in that night. Once Keegan got his, he was done getting anymore candy because he wanted to go back inside and eat his apple and Camden got mad at me when I took his from him so that I could eat some of the skin off of it first. Thankfully, for the most part they have forgotten about all the candy they scored (it's out of their sight, thankfully, so it's out of their minds most of the time).

We didn't do our usual trip to Bates this year, to pick out our pumpkins, which made me super sad, so I will make sure we do it early next year and I've already started thinking about what the boys are going to be next year (despite swearing up and down to AJ that I wasn't going to make them again and that we were going to buy them from now on). It will partly depend on what this little baby turns out to be and whether or not Keegan and Camden realize that they have a say in these things (the longer I can keep that fact from them the better). Now it's on to Thanksgiving and Christmas. Hopefully, I can be a little better organized.

And The Hits Just Keep on Coming...

2009-11-03T18:51:00.000-08:00

(and by "hits", I mean GOOD things...hopefully no one takes this negatively...we are super excited about our good news)

Through the Eyes of a Child...

2009-09-30T09:41:00.000-07:00

Apparently, I'm slacking in the getting myself ready each day category. Here's my favorite conversation with Keegan yesterday.

Keegan (while standing in the hallway outside the bathroom): "You straightening your hair mommy?"

Me: "Yep, buddy, mommy's straightening her hair."

Keegan: "Oh, we going to church today?"

Me: "No buddy, we aren't going to church today. It's not Sunday."

Keegan: "Oh...why you straighten your hair then?"

Me: "Just because buddy."

Sadly enough, Keegan's observation was spot on. I usually only straighten my hair on Sundays, and lately I haven't even been doing that. My poor husband and kids. They have to put up with so much...including a frumpy-all-the-time Mom/wife. Talk about a kick in the butt. Guess I need to start looking out for me a little bit more from now on.

Saying Goodbye

2009-09-21T11:04:00.000-07:00

Losing someone is never an easy thing. I am lucky. I have not had to face losing a loved one very often in my lifetime. In fact, I can count on one hand the number of close family members that I have lost. Today, I have to add one more to that total.

(what a handsome man he was, huh?)

My Grandpa Peterson passed away this morning, a little over one week away from what would have been his 97th birthday (I was born the day before his birthday and while I have always loved having my birthday close to both of my grandpa's this year it will be a little hard to celebrate). While we have known for a little while that his passing was near, hearing the news this morning has been hard. I wish that I was in Utah with my family. It is a bittersweet thing knowing that he is gone from our lives here, but also rejoicing in the knowledge that he is once again with his family and his loved ones who have already passed on. He is finally back with his beloved wife, my grandma, who passed away when I was 4 1/2. I can't begin to imagine how hard and how lonely the last 28 years have been.

(this is one of my most favorite pictures of the two of them, and she's just beautiful in the picture of just her)

He was an amazing man. I will miss his gigantic bear hugs that just wrapped you up so completely in his arms. I will miss hearing his greeting of "Howdy doo" whenever he would call on the phone or when we would arrive at his house in Utah. I am sad that my kids will never experience their great-grandpa and all the love that he had to give. He knew who each of them were, in his own small way, and I love that he kept track of them all on a piece of paper. My mind is full of memories (of family reunions in Yosemite, of sliding down his stairs in sleeping bags, sliding down the grassy hill on the side of his house, and oh so many more) and a couple of regrets. Regrets of not having spent more time with him when I was up there and not getting pictures of him with both of my boys when we were there for Ben and Karen's wedding (at least I have one of him with Keegan). I felt like I didn't have the time, and I knew that we would be back at Christmas, and in my mind, I truly thought that my grandpa would live forever and always be there. If nothing else, I have learned to not wait to do the important things and to make the most of the time you might have with your loved ones.

(not the greatest picture of all of us, I know, but it's all I have and it's better than none at all)

I don't quite know how to handle grief, since I have such a limited experience with it. I am happy that he is finally at rest, but it is so hard to let go. I will try and so this is how I will start to say my goodbyes to my grandpa. I love you, I miss you, I wish I had been there to kiss you one last time and to let you know how wonderful and amazing I have always thought you were. I am glad that you are finally at peace. I love you!!

*sorry for the blurry pictures and the flash spot in two of them. They are pictures of pictures, because I don't have a scanner.

Weekend Conversation...

2009-09-08T09:34:00.000-07:00

Me: "Keegan, what color do you think mommy and daddy should paint their bathroom?" (because we hadn't totally decided on a color yet, you see, so why not get a 2 1/2-year-olds opinion).

Keegan: "ummm....ORANGE!"

Me (and AJ at the same time): "Orange, huh, buddy? Why orange?"

Keegan: "Orange happy color. Makes you happy."

Me: "Hmmm...ok. Then what color do you think mommy and daddy should paint your bathroom?" (not that it will be happening any time in the near future).

Keegan: "Ummmm.....(and he really thought about this before answering)....ummmm, PURPLE!"

Me: "Really, purple? How come purple?"

Keegan: "Purple happy color too."

Me: "Okay buddy, you got it"

I should probably note that this conversation took place in our bed Sunday night at about 10:30 p.m. where AJ and I were laying there totally exhausted and Keegan was fighting going to sleep (the kid was completely wired) and we couldn't put him in his room and risk him waking up Camden. Seriously, where did this kid come from? He is so entertaining.

Congratulations to the Bride and Groom

2009-07-28T09:33:00.001-07:00

Ben and Karen Leach

Married July 25, 2009

Draper, Utah

Keegan-isms

2009-06-30T22:02:00.000-07:00

In the effort of not forgetting things that happen in my day to day life, this post is dedicated to the cutest little 2-year-old I know.

*Yesterday, while we were eating dinner before we left to spend our FHE at the zoo (I love that they are open until 9 pm for the rest of the summer), Keegan decided that apparently I had been bad, and that I needed a time out, so he put me in time out. He told me that I needed to go sit on the red couch and with the help of his dad they set the timer on the microwave for 2 minutes and Keegan told me that I wasn't allowed to move until the microwave beeped. Then, with a little encouragement from AJ he also told me to "Be Good, Momma" and "No hurt Baby Camden". Once the timer went off, I was allowed to come back to the table and then a few minutes later, Keegan put Camden's panda bear in time out and then decided that he needed to sit on the couch with him, because they had hurt Baby Camden. I guess things are sinking in more than I thought, and apparently my consistency is paying off, even if it's not necessarily in the way that I had thought it would.

*Before we left for the zoo, AJ gave Keegan a lollipop (they are his favorite treat as of late) and told him that he could have it after we were done with the zoo, but that he had to be good while we were there. Keegan had a death grip on that poor little lollipop the whole two hours we walked around the zoo and kept telling us that "after zoo, eat my lollipop" just to make sure that we hadn't forgotten the deal that we had made with him. Well, sure enough, the second he got through the zoo exit, Keegan stopped, looked at AJ and me and said "eat my lollipop" with the biggest grin on his face that a little boy could have. He took AJ's promise literally and as soon as we left the zoo, he hate his lollipop. Our ride home was littered with the soundtrack of an exhausted little boy eating his blue lollipop and saying "nummy nummy nummy". Cutest thing ever!!

*I love that to Keegan the best part of an ice cream cone is the cone itself. He couldn't care less about the creamy, yummy deliciousness that is ice cream and will literally eat the cone from both ends (we usually get waffle cones). Needless to say, he's a huge mess because of the dripping ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, but whatever makes him happy works for me.

*Keegan has turned into a little parrot...seriously, I love the things that come out of his mouth. although it has made me more cautious of the things that I say and the words that I use. I really need to just carry around a tape recorder with me all day long just so I can catch the things that he says. I no longer have the radio on in the car because the running commentary come from the back seat is far more entertaining. He points out the library, the fire trucks, the ambulances, the trash trucks, the back hoes, and what ever else might be outside his window as we drive around on our errands. It amazes me, too, that we can drive on a certain street and he instantly knows where we are going (especially if we are going to Grandma and Grandpa's house).

*I love that Keegan is AJ's shadow...anything that AJ does, Keegan can do as well. That's why he is currently sporting a scrape on his chin from trying to stand up on his skate board (just like Daddy) and why I have pictures of Keegan digging in our garden with his shirt off (because that's what Daddy does). It's great. So for now, he's a surfboard rider, a skateboard rider, a baseball player, and a race car driver who goes "super fast". Just ask him, he'll tell you all about it.

*Keegan has recently learned to count to ten, although he seems to have something against the number 7 so he likes to leave it out. Listening to the way he says "one, two, three, etc." can put a smile on my face no matter what kind of mood I might have been in before.

*Everyone (and everything) is referred to as "these guys" and "those guys" and they are all usually considered "funny". Apparently the world is here to entertain my little 2-year-old.

There are a million and one other things that he does and says each and every day...these are just the things that seem to stand out the most and that make me smile. I really don't think that I could love this little guy any more than I do right now.

"Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary, How Does Your Garden Grow.."

2009-06-30T15:49:00.000-07:00

In our case it's with snow peas and green beans and tomatoes and corn and squash and zucchini and avocados and lots of other yummy stuff (at least we hope it will, provided that everything grows as we want it too). With lots of love, water, "worm tea" and an insane amount of luck, we are hoping to have a great harvest this year.

Plus, we have a secret weapon...the cutest little "farmer" (and to be honest, the whitest one) that San Diego has ever seen. We can't possibly fail, right?

Progress is being made...

2009-06-30T15:41:00.001-07:00

In just a few short weeks, we've gone from this:

to this:

Progress is such a beautiful thing sometimes. There are still some things left to do, like getting shower doors put in and picking out a counter top and sinks and sink faucets and the color on the wall is going to be changing, and then all of the little touch up things that need to be taken care of, but I *almost* have my bathroom back...and after a year and a half that is a beautiful thing.

London Calling

2009-05-20T12:08:00.000-07:00

AJ's off to London...and I'm a little jealous, but in the scheme of things, it's better that the boys and I didn't take the trip after all. Besides, there will be plenty of other opportunities for world travel, and I really need to be here for now, because our bathroom is FINALLY getting finished this week. I'm so excited (although I do wish that AJ was here to supervise the whole process, but such is life...and this way I get to make decisions on things like sinks and shower heads and faucets and he can't change my mind!). Hopefully the majority of the work will be done before AJ returns on Monday.

On a side note...with the warmer temps, it was time for some little munchkins to get some hairs cut. Aren't they cute?

Camden's hair is so blonde and fine, and he looks more like a little boy and less like a little baby now, which makes me sad. I'm hoping his hair grows back in a little fuller before we go beach camping in a week and a half. Keegan so didn't want to get his hair cut at first, but after seeing Camden get to sit in the airplane chair and eat animal crackers and get a dum dum , he caved (personally, I think he just didn't want to be shown up by his little brother...and the blue dum dum and the firetruck chair were the icing on top of the cake). Both boys did great. Now it's just up to AJ to maintain the cuts. After the hair cuts, it was time to eat some yummy corn dogs and cherry lemonade and then run through the water fountains for a little while. I've decided life is grand when you are a two-year-old.

Honeymoons and Siblings

2009-05-15T11:35:00.000-07:00

I've been reading a lot of books lately. My library card is starting to look almost as worn out at my zoo pass and my debit card (the two most used cards in my wallet these days). I've always been a reader...thanks to my mom, but lately, I've really gotten back into it again (much to the chagrin of my husband, I'm sure, since I usually stay up late to read instead of going to bed like the responsible adult that I should be). I read books on all subjects - vampires, potty-training, romances, historical figures, wars, you name it, I've probably read a book on it at one time or another (being an English minor helped this effort to some degree).

But I digress...this post isn't about all of the books I've been reading...it's more about one particular book and all of the memories and thoughts that this book has inspired. The book that I just finished is titled "Honeymoon with My Brother" by Franz Wisner. It's been on my "to read" list for a while and when I saw that the library had it, I requested it right away. The book is a memoir of the time that Wisner spent traveling around the world with his younger brother, that he didn't really know, after he was left at the altar by his fiancee. During his travels, Wisner learned a lot about himself, about his brother and about the world in general. While I will never have the opportunity to take 2 years of my life to travel around the world visiting 53-different countries, I have had the pleasure of spending some time seeing the world with two of my sisters (at different times) and this book brought those memories back to the front of my mind and made me want to dust off the old passport and pack a backpack and see the world some more (so for all my siblings who might be reading this...if you want to go, let me know!) :) The fact that AJ has been doing a little globe-trotting for work lately (and is getting ready to leave for another 5 days in London) hasn't helped the situation much, either, because lately I've been reflecting on the three "honeymoons" that I have been able to take (so far) in my life.

The first "honeymoon" I ever took was with my sister Cynthia. Like most siblings, growing up Cynth and I had our differences, but as we moved away from home and got a little space and perspective (and maturity) we've managed to forge a friendship along the way. When she asked me if I wanted to travel with her around England, Ireland, Scotland and Wales shortly after she graduated from BYU, I jumped at the chance. While our trip wasn't inspired because of something like being left at the altar, on my part at least, it was inspired by the need to do something more with my life. I was turning 25, I still wasn't done with school, I wasn't necessarily loving my job (and I had a lot of vacation and sick time that needed to get used) and I was just generally looking for a break...a vacation from the rest of my life. It was the best time of my life...I loved being able to spend long hours on trains actually getting to know my sister. I loved that I got to see her relationship with my brother-in-law from the very first stages of "eternal bliss". I loved watching her in the act of falling in love and being able to see that side of her, as we searched for "Alice in Wonderland" postcards in Oxford so that she could send them to Ryan (it's one of his favorite stories, if I remember correctly). I loved getting the chance to connect on an adult level, away from all the pettiness and hormonally-charged emotions of teen angst. It was great discovering that even though we have differences of personality and opinion, on some levels we are still very much alike. I would never trade those two weeks for anything and I'd do that trip all over again, in a heartbeat, if she asked me too, because on that trip my sister became more to me than just family, she also became my friend.

After being bitten by the travel bug, the following year, I was able to experience my second "honeymoon" and spent a week in Paris, France (one of my "must-see before I die" places in the world) visiting my younger sister, Valerie, while she was there spending the semester studying abroad. This time, a lot of this trip was spent on my own. Val had the place where she was staying for the semester, so I had my own hotel room, and while she was in class (doing the student thing) I was able to explore Paris on my own (something that terrified and yet excited me at the same time). I spent the better part of 3 days exploring the Louvre and all of the art and treasures that it has to offer. I wandered the streets of Paris, checking out the sights and the sounds and the smells of one of my favorite cities (I don't care what most of the world might think to the contrary). I perused museums, bookstores, shops, parks, churches and was even asked directions by other tourists (and I was actually able to respond and send them in the right direction), and I got to learn a little more about my sister because not all of my time was spent in solitude. Some of it was spent enjoying some ridiculously yummy hot chocolate at Angelique's (right by the Louvre) and amidst the gardens and gilded halls of an amazing palace and in coming to the realization that my little sister was no longer "little"...she was my equal, in many ways, and in some ways, my superior. She is daring and brave and adventurous and intelligent and absolutely amazing. She listened to me talk about "the one" and heard all of my fears about an acquaintance that was on the cusp of becoming something more (and that eventually turned into a proposal, a marriage and two kids and that is so much more than I could have ever dreamed "way back then"). She inspired me to be willing to take risks and to go after something more. Once again, my sister became something more than just family...she also became my friend.

The third "honeymoon" of my life was the one in the most traditional sense of the word (after all, a honeymoon is a period of blissful harmony). It is a honeymoon that still continues to this day and I have never been happier. I've been able to explore this life, wherever we might be, with my most favorite person of all time. I have grown, matured, and experienced life with my best friend, and I can't wait for our honeymoon to continue for an eternity to come.

So here's to honeymoons (whomever they may be with) and family and experiencing all that life has to offer. Anyone up for an adventure?

The Legacy...

2009-04-27T16:30:00.000-07:00

Boys - 3; Girls - 5

It's taken a while, but the boys are slowly gaining on the girls. I love when all the cousins get to see each other (especially since it means that all of my siblings are together which is fantastic).

This is what happens...

2009-04-27T16:22:00.001-07:00

When Keegan spends the weekend surrounded by all of his girl cousins:

At least he didn't put on a dress...and he did spend quite a bit of time "shooting bad guys" with his cousin Finn (the only boy cousin he has so far), and he had spent quite a bit of time playing with a baseball bat, golf club and a slew of wiffle balls.

But still, I can't help but wonder how much this is going to cost me in future therapy bills.

USS Midway

2009-03-18T13:29:00.000-07:00

Since I made a goal to become more of a tourist in my own city and enjoy all that living in San Diego has to offer, the boys and I made a trek the other day down to San Diego Bay to see all the boats that are there (and possibly catch a glimpse of the gray whale that's decided to hang out there). It was a beautiful day...not too hot and not too cold, so it was perfect to be that close to the water. I put the boys in the stroller and just kind of walked along the waterfront looking at all the different boats that are there. Keegan saw the USS Midway and wanted to go up and see the airplanes that were on the "BIG boat". Since I had never been on it (and it was stroller friendly), I decided to take the tour. It was a lot of fun, and there were places where you could actually climb up into the cockpits of some of the airplanes or sit in one of the helicopters. For as much as he talked about the airplanes, when it came down to actually climbing up into one, Keegan became a little scaredy-cat. He was fine just looking at them, and then driving the "cars" that they had on the deck as well . At one point, as we were walking around (and after having just listened to how they land the planes on the deck) one of the volunteers asked Keegan if he was ready to land a plane there and, of course, being the super-confident kid that he is, he nodded his head and said yes. Someday, maybe, we'll just have to see, I guess.

I was a little disappointed in some of it, mostly because the majority of what you can see is on the flight deck and in the hangar area. There weren't a lot of other areas that you could go and see (at least not easily with the stroller) but I didn't mind it too much since a few years ago AJ and I were able to go and see another aircraft carrier that a friend used to be on and have a more private tour when everyone was on shore leave. Plus, Keegan and Camden didn't seem to mind much at all.

She's Crafty...

2009-03-17T10:19:00.001-07:00

Since I've managed to slack a little on the whole blogging thing, I figure I better catch people up on what I've been doing so that you don't think that I'm a complete slacker on all things blogging and journaling.

Lately, I've been trying to be better about working on my goals for the year, and one of them that I had was using my mom's sewing machine (since I've had it for 2+ years at this point) to make things for the boys and for me and for family and just for fun. I've managed to make (although I wouldn't say master) a couple of pairs of pajama pants for both of the boys, with a couple more still left to go. Then, I made these for my niece's birthday (Julie, I guess you are getting the preview of K's pj's ahead of time after all):

They are a kimono style pajama, and for my first time ever making this pattern, I don't think they turned out too bad (hopefully my niece will like them). It took me a little longer than I wish that they had, but it was a lot of fun picking out the fabric and making them.

I've also started making jewelry again (and can I just say, thank goodness for a library that has a lot of different books on the subject so that I can get ideas for free!!). This bracelet was for another niece's birthday:

It's got little princess charms on it (since she is currently obsessed with all things princess, as every young girl should be in my opinion). I've also made a couple others that I'm trying to decide if I want to try and sell somewhere or if I'll just give them away to friends and family as gifts or just because.

When Family Comes to Play

2009-03-17T09:57:00.000-07:00

My sister Cynthia and her two kids were here last week for a visit (they got to spend the first part of their trip at Disneyland and in the O.C. before they made it down south to visit us). I'm so glad that the weather cooperated, seeing as how they were predicting rain for the first couple of days that they were here in San Diego. It was a really low-key kind of visit. Keegan got some great cousin play-time in and her kids got to just kind of run around and be free after having to stick close to their mom and dad at some of the busier attractions.

After a little bit of excitement on their first full day here (AJ managed to jack hammer through our water main shutting off all water to the house for most of a day - I hoping that doesn't scare any further family members or friends from coming to visit...I promise, we have the water back on and AJ's been really careful with the jack hammer ever since) things kind of settled down. We played at Mission Bay (not in the water...just at the gigantic playground there), we went and saw some tide pools where Keegan and Finn got to see a big starfish and a couple of smaller crabs, while Berlin and Camden and I hung out on the safer sandy part, and we just kind of hung out around the house watching Disney movies (all the princess ones if Berlin was picking and Peter Pan if Keegan had the choice), which is sometimes nice after a couple of crazy days.

It was so great to have family come and visit, and it made me wish that we were all a little bit closer geographically (or that we could figure out how to teleport or travel through fireplaces) in order to make visits easier to do. Keegan misses having cousins to talk to (even if they had no clue what he was saying) and I miss having my sister here to visit with.

And since no post is complete without at least one picture to look at, here are a couple from their time here (you can see more here).

How Can You Not Love This Face....

2009-02-11T21:42:00.001-08:00

SERIOUSLY...I mean, SERIOUSLY does it get any cuter than this (and yes, I so know that I am biased). And those dimples...SWOON. This is why I love bath time at my house.

Growing Older

2009-01-30T14:11:00.000-08:00

"Young boys should never be sent to bed, they always wake up another day older" - Johnny Depp (as J.M. Barrie in "Finding Neverland")

The boys had their checkups the other day, and while I still can't believe that I have a two-year-old, I'm equally in awe of the fact that Camden is already five months old. Wowza, where does the time go. At five months, Camden weighs 17 1/2 pounds (yeah, he's my little porker) and is 27 1/2 inches long (which puts him in the 95th percentile). He loves his toes and thinks that they are better than any toy that I could possibly give him. He is all smiles and giggles and laughter (although teething is making things a little bit rough for him for the moment) and is fascinated by his older brother. Seriously, his smile couldn't get any bigger as soon as he spies Keegan anywhere near him. If we put them even remotely close to each other Camden finds a way to latch on to Keegan's shirt or hair or anything and he won't let go. It's great to watch them in the bath together. Camden is watching Keegan who is busy splashing and playing around. I'm just hoping that Camden remembers just how much he adores his brother when he gets into the teenage years. Hopefully they will manage to stay friends and not make things too rough on their poor parents.

Keegan, at two years old, only weighs 27 1/2 pounds (and he started out so big when he was younger...but he's totally thinned out) and is 35 inches tall (which makes AJ a little scared that he won't be over 6 feet tall, which is his only requirement for our boys). He is pure boy and goes non-stop all day long. We are discovering the temper tantrums and learning to work around them (usually it's because he's hungry) and he is definitely testing his limits, but his smiles, hugs and loves and random moments of snuggles/cuddles make up for it all in the end. I wish I could just figure out how to freeze time, even just for a few moments a day, so that I could somehow slow down how quickly my boys are growing. It's going way too fast, and I'm definitely not ready for it.

To Keegan on Your Second Birthday

2009-01-26T22:26:00.000-08:00

Dear Keegan,

Happy Birthday little man (I'm only a day late in getting this written...that's pretty good for your mommy)! I can hardly believe that you are already two years old. I still remember everything about the day that you were born like it happened yesterday. You continue to amaze me daily...just like you amazed me the day that you were born. I can't believe how much you have grown in the last year. It really is fascinating to see what a difference just one little year can make. Please slow down a little. I really want to enjoy this time in your life and you are quickly becoming such a little man and shedding your babyhood and it really just makes me want to cry. My favorite time of day is when you come running down the hall after your nap, arms laden with all of your possessions (or at least the ones that you have decided to carry around for the day) and you have the biggest smile on your face as you tell me that you are awake.

You seem to be growing by leaps and bounds. I looked at you this morning as we were getting ready to go to the doctor's and searched your little face and tried so hard to see the little baby that you just were and I could hardly find any trace of him. Last year you were walking...this year you are running, hopping, skipping and jumping your way through life. You are so much like me and so much like your dad and yet you still manage to be so much of your own little person. You are independent and stubborn and willful and adamant about the things that you want. You have your own schedule and know exactly what you are ready for. You are fearless now, willing to try anything that your dad and I expose you too. Your current favorite words are "bus" and "firefighter" and "vroom vroom vroom" for motorcycles/dirt bikes, scooters and snowmobiles. You are soaking up sign language like a little sponge and you are making it hard on your dad and I to keep up with you and all that you have learned. You love to be outside helping your dad in the yard, and you are so willing to help with the sweeping and the vacuuming around the house.

You are a fantastic older brother. I love watching you turn around in the shopping cart as we walk through Target and hearing your brother laughing at all that you do to keep him entertained and happy. I love to watch his face light up when you walk into the room. It shows just how much he loves you and already looks up to you as an example in his life. I love that you show concern for him when he is crying and that you let me know "Mama, baby cry" and that you go to him and rub his head and tell him that it's "otay baby." Thank you for being such a great older brother....Camden is so lucky to have you.

You are hope for a better and brighter and more fulfilling future. You are "Mi Mouse" and "Einsteins" and "Nining Time" in the mornings with puppy and snuggles and your cup of milk. You are a little mover and shaker whenever music comes on that seems to "speak" to you and makes you just have to dance (even when we are in the middle of Sports Authority looking for cold weather gear to bundle you up in). You are shaggy blonde hair and big, brilliant blue eyes. You are smiles and loves and hugs just because you can give them and you know how much your mommy and daddy and brother love getting them. You are animal sounds and animal signs. You are in your "big boy" bed and you fight with all your might when it comes to going to bed and yet you are so willing to take your nap in the afternoon. You are endless rides around the block on your bike, or your daddy's skateboard with your helmet on. You are pockets stuffed full of countless treasures and keys in hand ready to go out and face the world head on. You are cuddles on the couch (or the floor or your bed) and books pulled off the shelves and read over and over and over again. You are hymns sung in your own way (and at your own volume) during church and a solid "Amen" at the end of every prayer. You are smiles and "cheese's" for the camera. You are hats put on backward and "cool dudes" put on upside down (until you remember to turn them "round"). You are "just one more" when it comes to just about anything that you love (like candy and t.v. and books and time in the bath). You are serious and stoic and silly and at times you seem so much older than you actually are. You are the occasional temper tantrum and rolled eyes when I ask you to do something that you don't want to do. You are a quiet "tarry" whispered when you know that you have done something wrong. You are a little hand placed so confidently in my own, as if you know that I would give my life to keep you safe from all that is negative in this world. You are laughter and giggles and snorts and smashed bugs and just pure "boy" and you are the joy and light of my life.

Continue to challenge me...and continue to trust in me. Please stay fearless and compassionate and loving and generous and stubborn and willful. Continue to know what you want out of this life and never be afraid to go after it. There is so much that I want for you in this life and I'm going to do all that I can to make sure you get it. I love you, little man. Happy Birthday!!!

Love,
Mommy

Dear Winter Vacation

2009-01-19T15:32:00.000-08:00

Dear Aspen, CO:

Yes, our little family of 4 is descending upon you and we can't wait, despite projected temperatures of 37 degrees during the day and 14 degrees at night, and a snowstorm on Friday and Saturday. Yes, we are woefully unprepared (for the moment) but I can't wait to introduce my boys to the snow for the very first time (somehow I think my extra baby weight just might be a good thing for the moment). Hopefully there will be lots of fun pictures (and no frostbite or injuries) to share upon our return.

Love,
The 3 snow bunnies and the snow whale

Dear San Diego, CA:

I love living here, you know I do, but at the same time 75+ degrees in the middle of January has gotten to be a bit much. I need to actually be reminded of the fact that it is winter. If this is a preview of what you have in store for me this summer, I really need to start stepping up the weight-loss so that I can be prepared for a very long, very hot swimsuit summer. Good thing I have two little water babies for children. Keep things warm while we are gone this week. I have a feeling we are going to be needing a good thaw when we return on Saturday.

Love,
The Sun-loving (and yet, still snow-bound) CRAZY family of 4

WANTED:

2009-01-14T08:11:00.000-08:00

One Pre-Babies Body (A.K.A. "the former me")

Let's be honest, running (or any attempt at said exercise, or any other exercise for that matter) with 30+ extra pounds SUCKS and personally I'm a little sick of it all. Yes, I recognize that it is totally my fault. I didn't really exercise before babies (and naively, I thought that I didn't need to) and I was the one that gained 50 pounds with my first pregnancy and then didn't lose all of the weight before getting pregnant again (but I did lose quite a bit of it). And yes, I was much better with my weight gain the second time around and only gained the "recommended amount of weight", but it's not going away like it did with Keegan. I never really thought that it could be this hard. I have had to face some cold, hard truths about myself, like the fact that I lack the discipline and self-control to completely cut out sweets from my life (sorry, but I like my ice cream way too much) and that I eat because I'm bored, tired or simply because the food is there and I know that needs to stop. I'm willing to make the changes needed, but I really wish the it would happen a whole lot faster than I know that it will.

So, I'm offering a REWARD to anyone who can tell me where my former self is and how I can get it back ASAP (I'm talking lightning speed here folks). You can have all the yummy snacks and treats that I'm going to have to cut out of my life. If you have any information you know where and how to find me.

Catch Up Time

2009-01-13T10:50:00.000-08:00

So I realize that I've been slacking a little...I didn't really do a Christmas post, and I haven't really done anything since before Camden's surgery and there's really no excuse. I don't have a ton of pictures from Christmas, because I happened to be holding the best present ever on my lap, but I did manage to capture a few images of the boys that day.

This was actually taken on Christmas eve once the boys were in bed. Because Camden and I had just gotten home that day we didn't really go anywhere for Christmas, which to be honest, was pretty nice. We woke up and had a leisurely breakfast of pancakes (in the shape of Santa, a snowman and a reindeer of course), eggs and bacon and eventually got around to opening our presents. I think that we were all a little spoiled in our own way this year. AJ's parents came up later that afternoon and brought a second round of presents, which Keegan loved. He got a bike this year from Grandma and Grandpa and has since proceeded to put 100's of miles on it. My parents came on the weekend which meant yet another round of presents. Keegan loved the books he got (and won't really share them with anyone else) and reads them multiple times, daily. Good thing he has his little chair now to read on.

For someone who had just gotten out of the hospital about 24 hours before, Camden was an amazingly happy little kid on Christmas. I mean...it was ridiculous. It probably had something to do with the fact that his mom had been holding him almost non-stop since we got home. Hmmmmm...good thing we've gotten back into our normal routine now.

New Year's Eve we went over to a friend's house for a little while, but had the boys home and in bed by 9. AJ was asleep by about 10 and I valiantly held on until about 11 before I realized it was silly to be awake when I could be sleeping (especially since I knew I would be getting up in a few hours to feed Camden) so I toasted the new year on my own and then went to bed. I guess some things change with age...and that's ok.

New Attitude for the New Year

2009-01-13T10:23:00.000-08:00

I'm not really one for making resolutions....especially since I know that more than likely, I won't be keeping them past February (if even that long). This year, however, I am determined to embrace a new attitude on life, because honestly, I'm kind of tired of feeling just "blah" about everything.

So, here are some things I'm determined to work on for the new year (and yes, you can all hold me to these and remind me about my commitment when I start to falter a little):

1. I'm going to be a little bit more selfish this year. Yes, I realize that this sounds a little bit funny, but I need to spend a little bit of time each day thinking about and taking care of me. I mean, I have a gift certificate for a massage that I was given over a year and a half ago that I still haven't used. It's time to use it, and to do other things to make me feel a little bit better about myself. After all, if I want to be able to take care of all my boys as best as I possibly can, then I need to take care of myself as well. That entails making sure I get enough sleep (there's nothing wrong with napping when your kids are napping and I need to remember to do it), making sure I'm eating right (and not just eating because I'm bored, or tired or because the food is there), making sure I'm getting the exercise I need (and losing the weight that I need) because all of those things will help me be a better wife, mother, and individual.

2. I'm going to learn (or re-learn as the case may be) some new skills. I've had my mom's old sewing machine at my house for quite some time. It's time to pull it out, face my fears, and start sewing. I know how, it's just getting over my own self-doubt and starting just one project to get me going on others. I'm starting with a cape for Keegan for his birthday...granted he might not get it till next Christmas, but at least I'm starting. I have a camera that I want to learn how to use better. Why shouldn't I be able to take pictures of my own kids that I'm proud of. I need to start experimenting. I'm not planning on making a career out of it, but why not learn to do it on my own and save having to pay someone else to capture moments in my life. I want to learn how to cook better for my family...I want to try new recipes (I'm shooting for a new one each week) and experiment with different things that I might have been afraid of before. I've already started with making Camden's baby food, and I'm hoping that I can continue to do more.

3. I'm going to make sure that my boys get some "one on one time" with me each day. I love my boys and they are growing way too fast. I need to just slow life down a little and take some time each day to let them know how much they mean to me and how much I love them. I need this one on one time as much as I hope they do. I need the time to enjoy their smiles, and their laughter and their love without having to worry about dishes or dinner or laundry or anything else. There are some things in this life that can wait a little until tomorrow (or longer)...watching my kids grow and experiencing life with them is not one of those things. I don't want my kids to look back on their lives and wish that they would have been able to spend more time with me (if anything I want them to be sick of all the time that mom spends with them).

4. I'm going to reinstate "date night" at my house. Before Keegan was born, AJ and I had a weekly date night. While I recognize that this just might not work each week, I'm going to at least shoot for once a month (hopefully twice) so that AJ and I can take some time to reconnect with each other. He's busy with work and church callings and playing with the boys. I'm busy in my own way...and it's time we step away from our busy lives for a while and just focus on each other. We've got plenty of people we can ask to babysit, and it's time we start asking.

5. I'm going to support my husband more. AJ's a busy guy and I need to start doing more to help ease some of the stress and burdens on his shoulders. I need to help him meet the demands of his calling and be there when he needs me to go to the temple with him, or put together a spreadsheet for training in the scouting program, or whatever the case may be. He's always supported me and I want to make sure I do the same.

6. I'm going to become a tourist in my own city. I am lucky to live in a BEAUTIFUL city. AJ grew up here, so there's a lot of things that I would like to do and places I would like to visit that he's been to plenty of times and has no time (or desire) to go "one more time." These places are new to me, and for the moment, new to the boys, which means that they have been drafted to the position of "Mommy's little explorers." We are going to pretend we are tourists and take in all that this beautiful city has to offer to us. If nothing else, it will make us better hosts when family and friends come to visit because we'll know all sorts of cool places to visit and see.

7. I'm going to reconnect with life. That means reconnecting with old friends, making new ones and overall learning to fall in love with my life again. I have been so blessed in all that I have been given and I need to start showing my appreciation for it. I want to take vacations with my family (even if it's just camping in Carlsbad for a week or taking a day or two off to go to Disneyland or Sea World).

8. I'm not going to worry about the things I can't change. I can't make more money magically appear in our bank account and I can't make our mortgage disappear. I can't make my old car magically turn into a brand-new bigger one, nor can I make those extra 30 pounds just melt away and my pre-baby figure magically return. I can however, stop worrying about all of that and just work on the things I can change. The weight will go away eventually, as long as I work on it daily, and the mortgage will slowly disappear as long as we keep paying on it. I can't control the weather (and really, right now I have now wish too) and I can't change the economy, but I can stop stressing about it all.

So, here's to 2009 and a brand-spanking new attitude to go with it.

Fear, Trust and Faith

2008-12-12T10:32:00.000-08:00

fear (feer) n. - a distressing emotion aroused by impending danger, evil, pain, etc., whether the threat is real or imagined; the feeling or condition of being afraid. concern or anxiety; solicitude.

There are few things in this life that I am afraid of. Spiders, roaches, and other creepy crawly things...I don't like them, but I wouldn't say that I'm afraid of them. Heights and flying....not really a problem. Snakes, sharks, etc...I don't like them and wouldn't want to be found anywhere near them, but I'm not necessarily afraid of them. That being said, there are things that I am afraid of. I am afraid of losing any member of my family. I love them all and could not imagine any one of them not being in my life for forever.

In the immediate sense of things, I am most afraid of losing my little baby. For those that may not know (and really that's probably most of you), Camden is having surgery on Dec. 16th. At my 20 week ultrasound (something that seems light years ago now) there was a mass discovered in his right lung. After multiple tests both before and after his birth, it was determined that the mass was pulmonary sequestration. Essentially, during his lung development a portion of his right lung didn't develop like the rest of his lung and while it has an artery that goes into it and supplies blood to it, it does not function like normal lung tissue, and really serves no purpose. We really didn't tell this to anyone other than family for the most part, because we didn't want to cause anyone undue worry. That being said, the closer his surgery date gets, the more afraid I've become because I can not imagine my life without Camden in it.

trust (truhst) n. - reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence. confident expectation of something; hope.

I do not trust easily. It takes time for me to make friends, close friends, because I do not trust easily. That is not to say that the people that I meet are bad and shouldn't be trusted...they are, it's just that I do not let people into my life and into my thoughts and emotions and I do not let down my guard until I know that I can trust them implicitly.

The more scared I have become about Camden's surgery, the more I have had to trust in the surgeon that we have chosen to perform it, and in the hospital where it will be taking place, and in the anesthesiologist who will be watching over my son while he is in surgery, and in the nurses who will be providing his care both during and after the surgery. I have had to place my trust in the knowledge that this is the best thing for him, that he is young enough that there will be no ill effects, that all things will go as they should and that he will heal quickly and it has been hard for me to do, but I have done it.

faith (feyth) n. - confidence or trust in a person or thing. the trust in God and in His promises.

I have done it because I have been able to trust implicitly in my Heavenly Father and in the promises that I have been given in blessings that I have received. I have been able to trust in the doctors because of the faith that I have in the prayers that have been offered on our behalf. I have been able to do it, because in times past, when I have doubted my own strength to make it through the challenges that I have been given, the Lord has held my hand and He has carried me through the darkest times in my life. I have faith that He will do so again, and this faith has made things just a little bit easier today.

Meet My Brother Ben..

2008-12-03T11:37:00.001-08:00

Who just happens to be THE GREATEST UNCLE KNOWN TO MAN!!! At one point he was pushing 5 kids on the swings. He has countless energy, and was willing to play and entertain the kids all weekend long. (Seriously, Keegan cried when he realized that Uncle Ben had gone home). He really deserves a medal.

He's also a fearless lobster hunter. First time out and he managed to catch the biggest "bug" of the night. He showed the veterans (AJ and another guy from our ward) how to get things done. If you get a chance, ask him what his first impression of lobster was. It's pretty funny.

He's also pretty suave! :) In general, the greatest brother that 6 sisters could have asked for and then some. He's a great friend, a hardworking employee, intelligent, dedicated to his church calling and one of the coolest people I know.

Thanks again, Ben, for all your help this weekend. We miss you already!!! :)

Attitude of Gratitude

2008-12-01T14:25:00.000-08:00

"You could have an experience with the gift of the Holy Ghost today. You could begin a private prayer with thanks. You could start to count your blessings and then pause for a moment. If you exercise faith, and with the gift of the Holy Ghost, you will find that memories of other blessings will flood into your mind. If you begin to express gratitude for each of them, your prayer may take longer than usual. Remembrance will come. And so will gratitude." - Henry B. Eyring "To Draw Closer to God"

My friend Angie had that quote on her blog and it truly made me realize just how much I have to be grateful for. I have been blessed with so much in my life. I have an amazing husband who is so patient with me, and who is so willing to help others out, even if it means giving up some of his very hard-earned free time. I am lucky that he was so willing to have 13 members of my family here this weekend (that's enough to drive any a little crazy) and so lucky that he enjoyed it. He takes care of me in ways that I didn't even think I would need taking care of and he never ceases to amaze me with his capacity for love and fun and generosity.

I have been blessed with an amazing family. I was lucky enough to have 13 members of my family here this weekend to celebrate Thanksgiving, as well as to be here when we blessed Camden in church (the other 4 members of my family were GREATLY missed). I am lucky that I have been blessed with such great sisters and a brother who truly bring out the best of me, and who remind me constantly that it's ok to not be perfect, and that sometimes you really just need to sit back and relax and let life happen. I'm so lucky to have a family that is willing to play silly board games (even when it's a little late and we are all a little punchy and willing to laugh at just about anything). I am lucky that they are so willing to play with and entertain my kids with no rest in sight (Uncle Ben will be sorely missed when he goes back to Utah by Keegan). I'm lucky that I will be able to carry those memories with me always, and that I will have the opportunity to make many more with my family.

I have been blessed with two amazing little boys who have made me a mother. They have demanded more from me than I ever thought would be possible for me give, and yet, whatever they have gotten from me seems to be enough. I am blessed to have such a happy little baby boy who smiles and coos and giggles and snuggles with you like no one's business, no matter what kind of chaos might be going on around him. He is seriously the happiest little baby in the world. Yes, he does cry, but those moments are usually pretty few and far between. I am lucky to have an almost 2-year-old(!) who every morning has to come into my room and check where every member of his family is before he can settle down into my bed and snuggle with me and his baby brother before our day really begins. I will always love hearing him say "Dada? Momma? Baby? Me Me (his name for himself) and then seeing his smile of satisfaction that everyone and everything is in it's place and that all things are as they should be. He gives loves like no one else can and is so gentle and loving with his baby brother (and Kaitlynn too when she is here) and could not be a better kid.

I have been blessed with great friends. Some new, some old, some that I have lost touch with, but I have amazing friends. All of them have, in their own way, shaped a piece of who I am today and I will always be grateful to them for their friendship. It amazes me to see the strength that so many of them have when they are faced with some truly trying times in their lives, and it gives me hope that I too will have the strength that I need when I face my own challenges in life.

I have been blessed with health, with financial security, with a home, with modern conveniences that make my life so much easier, with freedom to think for myself, to make my own decisions, to live as I see fit, to believe as I want and so many other countless things. The Lord is truly amazing, and I am truly grateful for all that I have been given in my life.

Been a long time gone and...

2008-11-11T16:38:00.001-08:00

this is why:

No, I didn't miraculously have a third child without telling anyone, but I am watching my friends little girl during the week from 7:30 to about 4:00 every day. She's two months older than Camden (almost to the day, even), so needless to say it's a little bit of a handful dealing with two babies under the age of 6 months and an almost 2-year-old. Any sort of schedule that I might have managed to get the boys on is now completely out the door and my stress level is a little bit higher than it used to be. I am, however, VERY grateful for the fact that I have been blessed with two very mellow, easy-going little boys who are willing to share their mommy and her time with someone else. I do however now have extra guilt for the fact that I can no longer devote 100% of my time to my little boys, and I'm trying to figure out how to get over it (for the record, I really don't think it will ever happen). I'm also grateful for the fact that I have been able to stay at home with both of my boys. I couldn't imagine having to go back to work at any point in their lives (at least not while they are this young) and I recognize just how lucky I am to be a stay-at-home mom (and I'm loving that title).

Anyway, before I kind of became homebound (the back seat of my focus just isn't big enough for 3 car seats and we're not quite ready for a mini-van yet) we managed to have a lot of fun with the boys. There was, of course, Halloween where my little lion (Camden) managed to win the prize for the cutest baby costume in the ward, but before that there was a visit from cousins (Becky, Keegan still asks daily where they are. He will be so excited to see them again soon, as will AJ and I), there was a trip to the pumpkin patch, an afternoon at Petco park where Keegan was able to realize all of his major-league dreams (if he even has any, that is) and the general busyness of home renovations (the boys room should be done this weekend, fingers crossed and all).

It is amazing how quickly time passes. Keegan will be two in just a few months, and has become such a little chatterbox, even if most of it is only understood by me and AJ. He is such the typical boy and is really quite the character with the greatest personality. Camden is 3(!) months old and growing like crazy (although not nearly at the rate Keegan did). He loves to smile and will do so on command or to anyone who pays him any sort of attention. He now rolls over any time I put him on his stomach (the little stinker). We will be blessing him on the 30th of November (not a shock to my family, but maybe news to others) so anyone who wants to make the trek to San Diego is welcome.

Here's some photos from our day at Petco Park....they'll have to do until I have time to post more.

BOO!

2008-10-17T12:05:00.001-07:00

Just a quick sneak preview of the festivities to come!!!

Love,
The Mischievous Little Monkey and The Super Cuddly Lion

I've so been there...

2008-10-05T21:59:00.001-07:00

I had made Keegan his lunch, and then gone to check on Camden who was sleeping (HOORAY!!) and then pay a couple of bills. Keegan got really, really quiet (which usually means he's up to no good), so I went out to check on him and this is what I found. He was so tired that he fell asleep eating his lunch. What this picture doesn't totally show you is the fact that before he laid his head down he had the foresight to push his plate out of the way so that he wasn't laying on it. Oh to be a kid again and just go so hard that you crash.

And because I can, here's a couple of pictures of Camden. I can't believe how big he has gotten. He really doesn't look like the typical 6 week old. He's about 12 1/2 pounds now. We'll see for sure just how much he's grown when we go to the doctor's in a couple of weeks (although I'm not looking forward to the shots that he will be getting).

Our Own Little Picasso

2008-10-05T21:48:00.000-07:00

This is what happens when it's late at night, AJ's gone at a meeting, and I'm nursing Camden and trying to get him asleep. The house gets really quiet and I know that Keegan is up to no good.

He was so proud of himself. He had colored all the way down my hall, on both sides of the hall. It was all I could do to not laugh as I told him "No, we don't use our colors on the walls." Unfortunately, I think that I have only myself to blame, since the day before I had marked his height on the wall with pencil.

He had to help me clean up, of course, although I'm pretty sure that it wasn't the punishment that I was hoping it would be (and it really only lasted long enough for me to take the photos documenting the whole thing). Thank goodness for Mr. Clean Magic Eraser sponges. They really do take crayon off the walls!

A Little Perspective...

2008-09-27T19:38:00.001-07:00

This is Keegan now:

pardon the blurriness; AJ was taking the picture himself.

And this was Keegan a year ago:

It never ceases to amaze me how much of a difference one year can make; especially in the life of a little boy. It is like night and day.

AJ on the other hand never seems to age at all. Personally, I don't think that's very fair, but I guess that's just the way things are.

It's Potty Time

2008-09-26T22:35:00.000-07:00

Yep, that's right. AJ and I are now embarking on a journey into unchartered territory (at least for the two of us). We are starting to potty train Keegan (and for those of you who really don't want to read a post about pee and poop, I totally understand, and feel free to skip the remainder of this post).

Keegan learned the sign for "potty" forever ago, but I don't think that he really made the correlation between the sign and actually doing it until recently. He's been telling AJ every night for the past week or so when he's been in the bath that he's needed to go to the bathroom (and to be fair, AJ has been telling and showing him for months how "big boys" go to the bathroom). So, AJ started taking him out of the tub and sitting him on the toilet and Keegan's loved it! Apparently he's a little backward, since he loves to poop on the toilet and he's really good about telling us when he needs to now (especially since I've begun bugging him a billion times a day about whether he has to go or not), but he doesn't really tell me when he has to pee, which is why he's still in diapers for the moment. Personally, I think some of the appeal was that daddy would give him high-5's every time he did something in the toilet, and I gave him a dum-dum today, and that he got to use his special green soap to wash his hands when he was done, but it's a start and we'll take what we can get.

That being said...for my readers that have been through this before, I'm looking for any words of wisdom, advice, suggestions, etc. that you can give me. Since he's already used to sitting on the toilet we aren't going to get him his own separate one (because I really don't want to have to empty it to be honest) and are just going to get a step stool to help him get on the toilet. I have been told to not use pull-ups, as they tend to provide a safety net for the kids sometimes, and a friend of mine did the whole "7 days with the kid being buck naked from the waist down" way, and it worked, but she has wood floors and I have carpet everywhere so her messes were a whole lot easier to clean-up. We did go out and buy him some "big boy underwear" today, but I'm not sure he really understood what we were buying, or what it means. He is only 20 1/2 months, afterall. So, what's worked for you? What didn't work? I'm all ears.

So, I'm a Slacker...

2008-09-26T22:08:00.000-07:00

What can I say, I've been slacking a little on the whole blogging lately. We've been busy, but not necessarily with anything earth-shatteringly important to talk about, and it's been hot (seriously, bring on the fall weather already...or at least what passes for fall in California) and I've been trying to keep Keegan occupied and busy and then I fall into bed each night and then think "oh wait, I wanted to blog today" right before I fall into a semi-deep sleep for 3 1/2 hours (yes, Camden is actually letting me sleep that long...HURRAY!!).

So, in order to make up for the lack of posts I will at least post some pictures, because really, that's probably all anyone who reads my blog is looking for, and to be honest, my brain isn't totally functioning right now, at least not enough to compose complete blog posts (hence the long run-on sentences. It's a good thing I'm no longer in school and being graded on this).

I love this picture...despite the fact that it's part in shadow and part in bright sunlight I love that Keegan is so gentle and loving with his brother. This was early one morning and Keegan just laid his head down on the pillow next to Camden. So great!!! We've been lucky...I'm well aware that it could have ended up very differently for us having had two kids so close together.

Keegan wanted to "hold" his brother (personally I think he was stalling and trying to put off bedtime), but only daddy could help him, so mommy snapped the picture.

This is what happens when AJ gets Keegan ready for bed. In the first picture, Keegan has AJ's socks on his feet and is pretending to call his dad on the phone (who just happens to be standing in front of him taking the picture). The little half smirk/grin is what makes me laugh the most in this picture. The second one is of Keegan signing the emotion "scared". It's one of the greatest signs that he does. He might know a lot of non-useful signs (I mean, really, does he need to know how to sign "skunk" or "rainbow" right now?), but the signing has been fabulous because he can still tell us what he needs, although he has definitely become the little chatter these days.

AJ had been looking for months on craigslist (seriously, greatest website ever!!!) and he finally found this one. He's had to restain it (and it's actually not totally restained yet), and they just put it up about a week ago, but Keegan loves it, and it means I don't always have to take him to the park when he wants to ride the slides and swing on the swings. There is a bonus to having a big backyard.

So I braved the zoo with both the boys about a week ago. Keegan had been asking to see the elephants and I wanted to make good on my promise to take him. Camden pretty much slepth the whole time, and Keegan was how he always is at the zoo...happy and friendly and wanting to look at everything.

I realized as I was going through my pictures for this blog that I have very few pictures of Camden. I guess what they say is true...you take more pictures and video of your first baby than you do of any subsequent children. Poor Camden...I guess I better get on that, so that I have pictures to put in his album. He was a little grumpy when I took this, but it shows how big he's gotten. At his 1-month check up he weighed in at 11 lbs and was 22 1/2 inches long. He's totally a little porker, but I love it.

Time Flies...

2008-09-03T14:10:00.000-07:00

So, I'm still alive. I can't believe that it has been two weeks already. Seriously, it blows my mind. Just over two weeks ago, I was lamenting the fact that time couldn't pass fast enough and now I want it to slow down just a little and let me catch my breath (and some zzzzz's while I'm at it).

We have been busy...it really is different this time around. I was terrified to take Keegan anywhere after he was born. Maybe because he was my first, maybe because it was winter and colder, maybe because I didn't seem to be feeling as good as I do this time around...who knows. I just didn't want to take him out and about for quite some time. Not so much with Camden, to the point where I actually feel a little guilty that he (Camden) hasn't had nearly as much snuggle and relax with Mom time as his older brother did. I was ready to take him to Sea World the day after we got home from the hospital (thankfully, smarter heads prevailed and AJ convinced me to stay home). Camden has however, already made it to his first football game, which really, is there a better "first outing" than that? Thankfully the Chargers won, and Camden and I got to enjoy it all from the comfort of an enclosed box which was relatively quiet, while Keegan and AJ watched from the seats that were much louder (their choice, I might add).

We have been spoiled...no one more so than Keegan. He has had lots of play time with his cousins (thanks to Becky being here with Aiden and Reilly and helping keep Keegan busy and preoccupied) and a TON of unprecedented one-on-one time with his Dada, and he has loved it. They went to the zoo, to the pool, to Sea World, to the aforementioned Charger game where he got to stuff his face full of potato chips and popcorn (a treat he had never had before but one that he instantly fell in love with). He danced to the music played at the game, he clapped and cheered whenever anyone did something great on the field and he clutched his little football tightly in his hands the whole way home. Now that AJ is back at work full-time this week, Keegan has had to adjust to the slower pace of life that mom has to lead right now, but he is adjusting (even though he still asks for "dada" roughly 20 times a day).

We have been well-fed...or at least Camden has. My little porker (and yes I can call him that) has already put on a pound since he was born and is currently weighing 9 lbs. 12 oz. The doctor has said he is looking great and seems to be doing just fine. While I don't think that he will put on as much weight as Keegan did that first month (the kid went from 9 lbs. to 12 lbs. in 4 short weeks), Camden is not shy about eating to his belly's content. Unfortunately for me, that means dinner is usually a bowl of cereal at 10:30 at night because I really don't want to warm up dinner and eat a full meal that late. This however, has helped the pregnancy weight already start to come off (Hurray!!!).

(We have also developed a nasty case of baby acne, which thanks to the heat and, apparently, all my excess hormones, means new photos might be a few weeks coming. so these will have to do for a while. Any help on how to clear this up quickly would be greatly appreciated).

We are adjusting. For the most part, Keegan is doing great. He gives his little brother lots of kisses and doesn't like when Camden is crying. He is willing to help fetch things for his mom (most of the time) and is usually pretty gentle and careful around Camden. There are the rougher moments, like when Keegan has decided that his brother is done eating and tries to pull him off my lap, but that is to be expected. I just have to make sure that when Camden is sleeping (which is does quite a bit), Keegan gets my full, undivided attention. So far, it has helped keep the relative peace in our household.

Thank you all for your well wishes and comments and phone calls and help (seriously, Becky, I can't thank you enough for spending as much time with us as you did and for keeping Keegan busy and occupied...we miss you and the girls already). I will get back to all of you one on one eventually...unfortunately, it may take a little while.

Love you all!!!

Plans...Schmans...

2008-08-21T23:04:00.000-07:00

When we were talking about whether or not to induce, a friend of mine commented that knowing her luck, she'd try and schedule a date and her baby would just end up coming when he/she wanted, without regards to the plans that have been made. I should have taken that to heart and considered it a warning.

So much for the best laid plans, because apparently my son wanted to let me know that the only schedule that mattered was the one that he was on and that it for sure did not have any room for negotiation. I really thought that we were safe...I mean, Keegan was 2 days past his 40-week due date, so I really didn't see a problem with scheduling to induce me 9 days before my due date this time around...and then my water broke Tuesday morning, changing all of our best laid, and carefully thought out plans (the ensuing scramble to get a hold of AJ, who was in surgery at the time, pack my hospital bag, try and prepare Keegan for everything that was to come and not completely lose it is pretty funny and entertaining now that I'm looking back on it...not so much at the time, but thanks to Becky, I made it through).

I guess that's what I get for thinking that I have any control over my life whatsoever, because here he is...a day earlier than his parents had planned, but not a moment too soon:

Camden Jay Durfee

Born: Aug. 19, 2008 at 3:56 p.m.

Weight: 8 lb. 13 oz. (although the nurses did say that he probably weighed more when he first came out, but they took so long cleaning him up and warming him up that he peed all over them and his blankets before they put him on the scale - serves them right for taking so long to get him into my arms).

Height: 21 inches

He gave us a little scare when he came out with the cord wrapped around his neck 3 times and once around his arm (hence the nurses taking so long checking him out), but he's a little fighter who has already asserted his independence. In some ways, this has been a much easier experience the second time around, and in other's it's been harder. It's an adjustment going from Keegan and his 25 pounds or so to this teeny, tiny little baby who doesn't even seem to weigh a pound. Sometimes, I feel like I'm learning this stuff all over again, but I have to admit, I'm loving every minute of it.

We are both already home from the hospital (they let us go yesterday, something I am forever grateful to my doctor for) and are slowly settling into life as a family of four. It was hard not being at home with AJ and Keegan for 2 days, but I have to say I got pretty spoiled having Camden pretty much all to myself for those 2 days. Keegan's doing ok, which is pretty good all things considered. He's still a little more attached to his dad right now, than to his mom, but he usually gets that way when he's had a lot of one on one dada time.

More pictures will come as we get them off of other people's camera (did I mention the fact that my bag wasn't packed?), as will the updates, but for now, here's the first official family photo (thanks Mom and Dad for having your camera there!):

On a somewhat different note...couldn't they be twins...or even triplets when you consider AJ's baby picture? I mean really...the family resemblance is kind of scary.

37-ish Weeks and Counting...

2008-08-12T23:52:00.000-07:00

And so the countdown begins. Hopefully, if things go as we have planned, I will be induced on Wednesday, August 20th. That means 7 more days filled with preparation for his arrival. That's 168 more hours before this little guy is added to our family. That's 10,080 more minutes of my life that will be filled with a myriad of emotions: fear, guilt, apprehension, hope, excitement, joy, exhaustion.

It didn't really hit me until today how much everything will change once we go from a family of 3 to a family of 4. I worry...constantly...about how this will affect Keegan. I hope that he is young enough that he won't really notice too much of a change, but I worry about how he is going to react when he has to wait, or when he has to start doing more things for himself. Right now, he is the cruise director of my day/life. When he wants something, for the most part, all he has to do is grab my hand and pull me in the direction he wants to go. That will all change, and while I know it will be good for him to learn to share a little more and to wait his turn, or to really listen when I say "no", I worry that it will somehow affect the way that he feels about me. Tonight, as AJ was taking him out of my arms where he fell asleep, Keegan stirred a little and murmured "My Momma" not once, but twice. It was the sweetest thing that I think I have heard in a long time. Usually, the last word out of his mouth as we are laying him down is "Dada". Will he no longer want his momma once I bring another little baby into our family? I worry that he will want nothing to do with me once I come home from the hospital...that he will no longer greet me with that sweet smile of his when I go to get him out of his bed in the mornings, or when he wakes up from his nap. I worry that he will no longer want to run into my arms, or lay his head against mine, or give me kisses no matter how many times in a row I ask for them. I worry that I will not be enough for him, as well as this new little baby and my husband. I worry that I will not be able to show enough love to Keegan...and that I will not be able to reassure him that he is still my whole world, even though my world has now gotten a little bigger and it includes a brother as well. He was the one that first made me a mom, and who opened my eyes to how much I could truly love someone so completely and nothing and no one could ever change that. I worry, also, that in trying to make sure that Keegan knows how much I love him that I will not be able to show that same amount of love to my husband and this new little baby of ours. Can there really be enough room in my heart for all of them? Do I really possess that endless capacity to love that I have heard so many mothers talk about? I worry that we really didn't think this whole "second baby" thing through and worry that maybe we should have waited just a little bit longer.

Along with the worry, there is the guilt. I feel guilty for changing Keegan's life at such a young age. I feel guilty for being so impatient with him lately, when it is so not his fault that I am huge and hot and exhausted. I feel guilty that I haven't given him as much attention as I feel that I should have, and I worry that I won't be able to squeeze enough "mommy and me" time in over the next 7 days. This is the last week of his life that he will be an only child...and I know that he has no clue that it is coming to an end, and it shames me with endless guilt that I am taking all that from him. I feel guilty for worrying about the ways that this little baby will change our lives in ways that we haven't even contemplated yet. I feel guilty for the added pressure that I feel this puts on AJ, who is already working so hard to make sure that I have the privilege of being at home with our children. I feel guilty that I don't tell him enough just how much I appreciate all of his hard work and all that he does for me...for all of the responsibility that he has placed upon his shoulders in order for it to not be on my own.

And yet there is this hope and wonder about what this new little baby will bring into our lives. I can't wait to meet him...to count all of his fingers and toes; to see who he looks the most like; to see whose eyes he got, or which one of our chins and nose he inherited. I can't wait to watch his own little personality develop, and to see with wonder, the world through his little eyes as he discovers this amazing world that he has been brought into. Keegan is still young enough that I remember the awe and wonder that I felt when he was first born. The amazement that this little baby was mine...that he was a part of both my husband and me. That he was created out of this amazing love that I have for my husband, and I can't wait to feel that again. I don't really have the words to describe what it feels like to hold your own, precious little baby in your arms for the first time...and I can't wait to do it all over again.

And still I fret and I worry...and the minutes just tick on by...faster I think, now that I know exactly when the end is going to be.

So Much for the Lazy Days of Summer....

2008-08-05T09:53:00.000-07:00

I've always thought that summer was for relaxing and enjoying the nice weather and the time off from work, wchool, etc. Yeah, so much for that. We've got a busy few weeks ahead of us, and while I'm excited for all that is going on, since it will help keep my mind off of the whole "due date" issue, I can't help but get a little exhausted when I look at our calendar as well.

This past week, AJ had to go up LA to cover the X-Games for his boss who had to be here in San Diego for the Chargers football practice. His boss generously offered to get us a hotel room if Keegan and I wanted to go up with him and to get us (meaning Keegan and me since AJ had free-reign for the whole weekend) into some of the events (I guess it's one of the perks that goes with the job). I was pretty excited...we went with AJ last year and had a blast. In all my excitement, however, I forgot the fact that I was 3 1/2 weeks away from my due date, that AJ would be working which means that I had to entertain a very active 18-month-old on my own and that it was going to be STINKIN HOT in Los Angeles. Needless to say, it was a little bit harder than I thought it would be, but still totally worth it every time I caught a glimpse of the totally entranced look on my little boys face (needless to say, we have now created a monster who thinks that he is going to be allowed to skateboard, BMX bike, motorcycle ride, rally car drive, generally put his life in extreme danger of broken bones and stitches, etc. by the time he's 3). And it did give Keegan and I a chance to have some mommy and son time before we became a family of four, which is something that I have been trying to do more and more of, since I know that things will change once we add another little boy to this family, and that there will be difficult times as we all adjust to the chance.

Oh yeah, and we got to experience the stereotypical "I stayed in a flea-ridden hotel in Los Angeles" cliche. Mind you, we were at the Sheraton right by the airport (another thing that Keegan loved, since he got to watch airplanes take off and land to his hearts content) and not the Motel 6 in a red-light district, seedy part of town. It's a good thing that we didn't have to pay for the room...someone at corporate office would have received a nasty letter from me, and to be honest, I'm still considering sending one, especially when I look at Keegan's legs and see all of the healing bites (I managed to escape unscathed, thankfully). The lesson I learned from the experience....don't use the hotel cribs when you stay somewhere if you can absolutely avoid it. That's actually where I think the fleas were hanging out prior to being let loose in our room. SO GROSS!!!

Now we have a few weeks chock full of family visiting, friends visiting, renewing old friendships, the circus coming to town (I'm so excited for this one...I just need to remember to take the camera), trips to the zoo, to the wild animal park, to Sea World, to the park, a bathroom to complete (the cabinets have been ordered, the window will be ordered soon and tile is getting picked out this week), new projects to start (since we are moving the boys bedroom to a bigger one, but we want to put in better insulation first...and maybe paint if I can talk AJ into it), books to read, a baby to prepare for, oh yeah, and then the normal work/church/adult responsibility things. I can't wait!!! I love it. I can rest another time.

And just because I've had some requests for recent photos of the little guy, here are a couple of shameless ones because he's so stinkin' cute (and I recognize that I'm totally biased when I say that): (Keegan likes to have his hair done "just like daddy"...this is the result)

(one of the only times you will see a picture of me this pregnant. Try to ignore me and focus on the cute kid in my arms please)

(Keegan's favorite...the big air ramp for BMX and skateboard. At least, it was until the dirtbikes started up and then all he could say was "Vroom, Vroom, Vroom" for the rest of the day. He had already decided, by the way, that he was going to be allowed to ride all three of the aforementioned things...much to my fear and trepidation)

(such a serious expression for such a little boy)

Failed Experiment #1254

2008-07-25T15:54:00.000-07:00

We have failed....miserably at that. And while I'm all for perseverance, I'm also practical and recognize when it's better to throw in the towel, wait 6 months and try again.

What did we fail at, you might ask? While it's really quite simple...Keegan is SOOOOOO not ready for a "big boy bed". A little back story might help. One night he decided that it would be fun to climb out of his crib. We were a little shocked...and worried, but after a thorough examination we determined that he was okay and that it was just a one-time deal. Yeah, not so much. He did it again a few nights later, and rather than stress myself over when he was going to break his neck, we decided that maybe it was time to start transitioning him to a twin bed, so that the crib would be ready for when his little brother would need it. So, I took the front of his crib off, put up a little railing and thought, "ok, let's see how this will work". The first day...not so great. Come naptime, whereas I used to just put Keegan in his bed with a couple of books, his snuggles and some water and then walk out of the room, Keegan realized he didn't have to stay in his bed, and after quite a bit of crying eventually fell asleep on the floor behind his bedroom door. Bedtime was only slightly better because he fell asleep rocking with me, but when he woke up later, he climbed out of his bed and came into our room. This same pattern continued for the next week and a half (can we say gluttons for punishment?). We tried everything, from shutting his door (he learned out to open it, and very quickly I might add) to going and laying on the floor next to his bed when he woke up, but as soon as we would think he was asleep and we would get up to leave, he would be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed all over again. The worst part of it was the fact that even though my side of the bed is furthest from the door, Keegan insisted on coming to me every freakin' night, while AJ (for the most part) was able to stay asleep. Finally, after a week and a half of minimal sleep, and one final night of Keegan refusing to sleep anywhere but in our bed with us, I gave up and put the front of his crib back on.

Even though we failed in our little experiment, our failure has felt like HEAVEN ever since. Keegan is back to his 2 - 2 1/2 hour naps each afternoon and is sleeping through the night once again, which means that I've been getting more sleep as well (and if I'm not, it's at least not his fault). For now, we'll let him sleep in his crib and the baby will sleep in the bassinet. Once he outgrows that, if Keegan still isn't ready for a twin bed, we'll utilize my mom's Pack-N-Play that she has very generously loaned to us (thanks again, Mom) until we can convince Keegan that beds are WAY cooler than cribs.

The only problem is, if this is how I handle all our experiments with Keegan, the kid won't be potty-trained until he's driving!! Oy Vay!

Dear Frustrated and Overwhelmed

2008-07-23T20:56:00.000-07:00

Dear Frustrated and Overwhelmed,
Can you please leave me alone for a while? I'm much happier when you are not around. Yes, I know that I have a choice and can allow life's little quirks to not get me down, but really there are just too many other emotions that I'm trying to keep in check right now and I could really use a break. Please go away and don't come back some other day.

Dear Park,
Thank you for leaving my son totally exhausted when we left you this morning. It was great to have him come home and take a nap and sleep for 2 1/2 hours. You made my son completely satisfied and I truly appreciate it. We will definitely be visiting you again...probably even this week. We look forward to lots more visits this summer.

Dear Public Library,
Thank you for giving me a chance to read a lot of different books without having to spend so much as a penny. I appreciate the fact that you are free, that you will transfer books from a library further away to the one that is closest to my home, therefore giving me the chance to take a 3 mile walk with my son. I also appreciate the fact that I can test out books and not feel guilty if I decide not to finish them, since I didn't have to spend any money on them. I also appreciate the fact that I can pick out a lot of different books for my little munchkin to read and to hopefully instill in him the same love of reading that I have.

Dear Robeks Polar Pineapple Smoothie,
Thank you for sustaining me through my pregnancy this summer. I'm so glad I took a chance to try you out. I really think that I love you more than my stand-by favorite known as the Jamba Juice Aloha Pineapple smoothie (and that's really saying something). I really think it's the papaya juice that you use that makes me love you so much. Needless to say, I look forward to many more lunch dates with you (unless, of course, I'm in the mood for the chocolate-y, peanut buttery goodness known as the Jamba Juice Chocolate Moo'd).

Dear Family,
I wish that I was much closer to you. I have to admit I was more than a little jealous that you were all able to get together earlier this week. Why can't we all just be independently wealthy and able to live on the same street right next too each other? I'm glad that the distance doesn't keep us from being close. I love and miss you all.

Dear Little Baby,
I'm so glad that you are really active, but can you please stop kicking me constantly? I'd really like to enjoy the last 4 or 5 weeks, but you are making it really difficult. I'd rather not be bruised from the inside out when you finally decide to come into this world. I really do look forward to meeting you, but can we maybe tone it down a little? Thanks, love you, Mommy

To Induce or Not To Induce...

2008-07-08T09:01:00.000-07:00

that is the question (for the moment at least). Some of you are probably thinking, "but you are only 32 weeks along and still have two months to go, why are you worrying about that right now". The thing is, I really hadn't even thought about it. Granted, I've joked with friends that I'm already done being pregnant this time around (especially when they told me that based on the last ultrasound measurements that they took of him on Thursday he weighs anywhere from 4 1/2 to 5 pounds ALREADY), but I truly recognize the importance of letting this baby "cook" for as long as he needs so that he can be as healthy as possible, as well as the importance of letting him come when he's ready to, and not necessarily on my schedule.

However, I also recognize that this time around there are a couple of things that I need to take into consideration...like who is going to watch Keegan as well as what AJ's work schedule is going to be like at the end of August (especially since I am due right at the beginning of the football season, not only for the Chargers, but also for the high schools and colleges that he works with). It would be a whole lot easier knowing exactly what day I'll be delivering rather than having to call AJ at work or the hospital out of the blue and the possibility of him not being able to get away right then. It would also be a whole lot easier to set up Keegan's babysitter ahead of time, rather than having to call someone at the last minute to watch him. Plus, that would give me a deadline to try and prepare him for all the changes that will be happening.

It's totally my OB/GYN's fault. When I was talking to her at my last appointment about some questions I had regarding my delivery, etc. since I didn't deliver with this particular office the last time around (although I really wish that I had) she mentioned that if I wanted to be sure that she was the doctor that would deliver me, she had no problem scheduling my induction. I don't know if she did this because she had just agreed the week before to induce my friend and she knew that I knew that, or if she just wanted to reassure me that she was willing to be there to deliver baby #2 (who is still nameless, unfortunately), or because she's just a totally cool doctor who is willing to consider her patients desires (unlike my former doctor who absolutely REFUSED to even discuss inducing me until I had reached 41 weeks...thankfully Keegan came at 40 weeks and 2 days, because I was really done at that point). Whatever her reasons behind the offer, it's given both AJ and I a lot to think about.

Unfortunately, I'm at the point in this pregnancy where I can't make a decision to save my life, or once I've made a decision, I end up changing my mind later, or not liking the final outcome (which is why our bathroom still isn't done yet, and why I no longer like the color that we painted in both our bedroom as well as the boys bedroom...although that was the last pregnancy's fault. Word to the wise...don't pick out paint colors when you are pregnant and only a month away from delivering).

Maybe it's a good thing I still have 2 more months to go.

"Do As I'm Doing...

2008-06-30T16:48:00.000-07:00

follow, follow me..."

Apparently, I must stand like this alot:
Is this not the most typical "pregnant lady" pose ever? (and forgive the diaper-clad baby...it was hot in our house today and I didn't have the heart to put him in more clothes after I took off the ones he got dirty at the Children's Museum today).

Now if only I could make my belly look as cute as his.

And I'm reminded more and more each day how much Keegan is like his dad...
Their somewhat matching outfits was totally accidental (seeing as how this was Keegan's third outfit of the day). Like father, like son, I guess.

Names, Names, What's in a Name (no, seriously)...

2008-06-29T19:24:00.000-07:00

So, I'm pretty sure that I've talked/blogged/pontificated on this subject before (ad naseum I'm sure for some people), but a lot of people have been asking AJ and I lately if we have come up with/decided on a name yet for this little baby who is coming in 2 months (hopefully sooner...and YIKES that's gone by kind of fast) and now I'm suddenly worried that we will be leaving the hospital with an unnamed baby. So much so that I lie in bed at night and think about it when I can't get myself back to sleep. The problem is...we can't seem to come up with a name. And it's not really even that we can't decide between one or two, it's literally that we can't come up with a name that just strikes both of us.

I don't remember having this much trouble coming up with Keegan's name. Maybe I had more time to sit and look through name books and on naming websites (since I was working then, ya know). I had a list of names that I loved and then I found Keegan and it just seemed right. AJ wasn't sold at first, but all of a sudden, he agreed. It was the right name. It was harder to decide on his middle name. We had two choices and couldn't decide between the two. That decision wasn't made until we were at the hospital (and the lady kept harassing us to hurry up and decide to so we could sign his birth certificate). But overall, the whole process seemed rather seamless...just simple and direct.

Not so much this time around. I look at naming websites, and through the naming book that I have and at the list that I made with Keegan, and I don't really like any of them. There are some that are "ok" and we've added them to the list, but none of them seem "right". Some we have ruled out because we don't want the kid growing up and being teased mercilessly from his classmates (like Duncan...which is one of my favorites, but AJ had a point when he said he'd be called "Dunkin Donuts" his whole life...or "Double D" like AJ's sister Des was growing up). The few that both of us think might work, end up being names of other kids that we know and see on a regular basis (which, I know, should be totally ok, but still, we are hesitant). We aren't trying to do anything too off the wall, or crazy unique, but at the same time, we don't want to just go with the same ol' Joe, Larry, or Jim (no offense to any Joe's, Larry's or Jim's out there). We have a friend who is due about 3 weeks before me and they've had their name picked out since they found out they were having a boy (it's actually one I remember my sister Cynth loving at one point in time...years before she was married and had kids, but still...it made me laugh. Cynth, you just have the touch with names). Another friend just had their baby daughter and they knew right away what they were going to name here (she's named after her maternal grandma and someone else I can't remember right now). We just can't seem to find that right combination (the sad thing is, we have names that we do like, but they just don't seem right this time around...totally crazy and silly, I know, but still).

So, I'm putting this out there. For my friends and loved ones with kids, was it this hard for you to find names (whether it was with your first or your subsequent bebe's)? Are we just making too much of it all? Should we just go with one of the names that we are just kind of "lukewarm" about right now and hope that it grows on us? And does anyone want a chance at naming my kid? (Anyone, Anyone, Bueller)?

Leather and Crystal...

2008-06-24T14:44:00.000-07:00

3 years ago today this happened...

I am so grateful to have been lucky enough in my life to be married to AJ for time and all eternity. He was well worth the wait. Everyday I marvel at how blessed I am to have him in my life, and still pinch myself in awe that it's not all a dream. He is my best friend, my confident, my support when I am not strong enough to deal with all the things that life hands me, he is my pillar of strength and faith when I am lacking, and he is all that is good and right with this world (or at least with my world). He is better than I probably ever deserved and I'm so grateful that he is all mine for eternity.

Even with all the little mishaps, changes in plans and raw emotions of the day, there is nothing that I would change about it. To me it was perfect.

Thanks to all those that supported us that day 3 years ago, and who continue to support us today. We couldn't have done it without you.

Here are just a couple of my favorite shots from that day:

And my absolute favorite picture from that day...I still need to get it printed out and framed. All in good time, I suppose.

Here's to another 73 years (thanks Val!).

Bon Anniversaire....

2008-06-17T11:52:00.000-07:00

31 years ago today, this "little" guy entered the world weighing in at a whopping 10 pounds 10 ounces (yes, it's his fault that I have 9+ pound children).

The day will be pretty mellow...He started it off by surfing EARLY this morning..I surprised him and made cinnamon rolls for his office this morning, along with some fresh fruit, fruit dip (thanks to my sister Cynth for the recipe) and OJ. He managed to finagle a free lunch from one of the drug reps for this afternoon and then this evening will be whatever I manage to throw together for dinner (although that could mean he ends up grilling on the BBQ, but that's ok). I guess it's true what they say...birthdays kind of lose their magic the older you get (although I still like trying to do something for him).

So, HAPPY BIRTHDAY AJ!! 31 years looks good on you!
You are an amazing husband, father, son, best friend and all around guy. I'm lucky to have you in my life.

Happy Father's Day...

2008-06-15T17:37:00.000-07:00

I may not be the most eloquent with words, but I wanted to say to all the wonderful dads and grandpas that I know out there (some I have pictures of and others I don't, but I hope you know who you are and how much you are appreciated):

Thank you for your example, your patience, your love, your kindness, your guidance, and most importantly of all, your attitudes of FUN.

Thank you all for making our lives richer and for working so hard to provide a good life. You have all given new meaning to fatherhood, and all the joys, sorrows, disappointments, triumphs, etc. that it entails.

Home Again, Home Again

2008-06-09T14:36:00.000-07:00

Finally, we are home!!

It's been a long and exhausting two weeks, but it's also been a fun two weeks. Camping with a 16-month old, while 28 weeks pregnant was definitely an adventure, and not necessarily one that I plan on repeating anytime soon (at least not in those exact circumstances or without a few extra creature comforts).

However, there were a lot of socialization opportunities for Keegan between watching 5 other kids for a week and then having 5 kids just a campsite away to play with at any time. I feel like he has grown up tremendously. I seriously wonder where my little "baby" boy has gone and why the heck he decided he could all of a sudden become a little "man".

The best part of the last week, though, has been all the time that AJ and Keegan were able to spend together, and the time we were able to spend together as a family. Keegan was able to learn all about the joys of lighter fluid on fire (I so had nothing to do with that), skateboarding with Dad, charging into the ocean (which is something that he has never done before), sandcastle building (and demolishing like he was King Kong), drinking salt water off of the sand and playing "fetch" with the squirrels (as a result, we did however manage to have the most squirrel-free campsite at the beach), just to name a few. It was a great week.

So here are a few pictures from our adventures of the past week at South Carlsbad State Beach (a place I highly recommend to anyone who wants to camp at the beach).

If anyone is interested, you can join us there next year! :)

Locks of Love

2008-06-09T08:34:00.000-07:00

So, it's not really a secret that I love Keegan's hair to be a little bit long. I was kind of hoping that he would inherit a little bit of my curl, but no such luck as of yet. However, that hasn't stopped AJ and I from keeping his hair a little bit longer, usually. Since we had a week of beach camping coming up, though, I knew that there was no way I wanted to keep his hair long. It would have been way too hard to put sunscreen on his head, so I decided it was time to cut it. And I don't mean just a trim...I mean really buzz it. AJ had been doing a really good job trimming it up, little by little all while trying to get Keegan used to the clippers, but I finally took matters into my own hands when Keegan decided that it was ok for Mommy to cut his hair (especially since up to that point he wouldn't let me anywhere near his head with the clippers). AJ was a little scared when I first told him that I had finally cut his hair because he had visions of a completely bald Keegan, but it wasn't nearly that bad.

So, here's the before...

And then here's the after...

Like I said, it wasn't nearly as bad as AJ had imagined it. And it's already started to grow back (I swear this kid is getting some sort of growth hormone on the side). And it has for sure made the whole sunscreen application so much easier. It wasn't perfect, but it wasn't too bad, considering it was my first time ever wielding a pair of trimmers. Still, I think I'll leave future haircuts to the professionals (or at least to AJ).

Pardon the Interruption

2008-06-03T11:00:00.000-07:00

Your regularly scheduled blogging has been interrupted by this...

We shall return to our regular programming at the end of the week. I'm sure I'll have some fun stories, or at least pictures, to share from our adventures camping here. After all, a vacation is a vacation, right, even if you are only 30 minutes away from home.

Do Over

2008-05-26T21:25:00.000-07:00

Can I get a do over? or better yet, can I get the chance to forget that today has ever happened?

It's been a day of Keegan not sleeping well all night long, until he finally settled down at 3:30 this morning; heartburn all night long that TUMS has nothing on; smoke alarms going off at 6 a.m. (apparently that's what happens when AJ and a 13 1/2 year old boy make breakfast that early in the morning); laptops falling and ruining the screen (and no, it wasn't ours and I'm pretty sure it's no longer covered under any kind of warranty...like I needed one more thing to have to get fixed, and it's even worse since it isn't ours, and I'm the one that wasn't paying attention so that it did fall in the first place because both of the babies were crying); being cooped up in the house for most of the day since the two babies aren't on the same nap schedule and as soon as one woke up the other went down for their nap shortly after and AJ was gone the majority of the day with the scouts on a hike, which meant I was alone for 3/4 of the day with 5 very bored kids; Keegan falling off the trampoline (at least this one wasn't my fault since I wasn't the one outside watching him at the time, AJ was); whacking Keegan's head into the door frame as I was taking him into the bathroom for his bath (only partially my fault since he decided, for whatever reason, to launch himself off to the side as I was going through the door); and plenty of tears on my part, the two 15-month-old babies parts, and the rest of the kids (not so much the two older ones, but definitely the two younger ones).

Seriously, it's been a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day here in San Diego. I think I'll move to Australia.

Good Idea/Bad Idea

2008-05-25T13:42:00.000-07:00

Good Idea: wanting to help some good friends out as a way of saying thanks for all the times they've helped us.

Bad Idea: when that help consists of watching 5 children who are not your own, or related to you in some way and who range in age from 15 months to 13 1/2, while their parents are away for 2 weeks in Brazil. What were we thinking? (thankfully we only have them for the first week and their Aunt is coming for the second).

Needless to say...it's been a crazy past few days and we still have a few more to go, hence why the lack of blogging. I have a newfound respect for anyone out there who has more than 2 kids, and who has ever had twins or more (seriously, Becky, how do you keep your sanity and keep on smiling?). I'd post pictures, but I have none and really, I think my hair is all gone.

I think next time we'll just offer to drive them to the airport. :)

P.S. I really do need to point out that they are very well -behaved kids who pretty much do as they are told and who are in bed by 8:30 at night at the latest. It's just that we aren't their parents, their schedule is totally different than ours, and I really miss my own house. It's just been stressful having more than just my boys and myself to worry about and take care of.

*on a side note, they have a gigantic trampoline which Keegan is LOVING. Seriously, he asks to "jump, jump, jump" every 5 minutes or so when we aren't outside. You can't really call what he does jumping, per se, but it's so stinking cute and he's having a blast (which makes one of us).

Reading Rainbow

2008-05-03T12:53:00.000-07:00

While I was busy cleaning up Keegan's room today, he decided that in the midst of helping me, he needed to take a quick story break. Mind you, this was right after I had just finished putting all of his books away in their tub and he had to take them all out before he settled on "Put Me in the Zoo". He then proceeded to tell me that he wanted to sit in the rocking chair and then he read his story to me while I finished vacuuming and dusting his room. I have to say, it was pretty stinkin' cute.

It's no surprise that I love to read. It's kind of a Leach family thing I think...we all grew up seeing my mom read books and reading books ourselves, and borrowing books from the library and the book mobile (do they even still have those?). Needless to say, I'm grateful that I have a little boy that loves his books as well. He already has his favorites and they usually go into his crib with him at naptime and we end up reading them a dozen times a day. It's one of my favorite things to do with him, because he snuggles right up to my side and just sits with me (it's one of the rare times that he isn't moving during the day).

Reading, I have discovered of late, can be a very expensive habit, however. This is why I have re-discovered the joy of borrowing books from the library. It started when I had library access while working at SDSU and has continued now at the public libraries in San Diego. Seriously, my library card is one of the most well-used cards in my wallet (second only to my debit card). Keegan and I go there at least 3 times a month, sometimes as often as once a week. I can get a whole bunch of new books for him to "read" and I can explore a whole bunch of different books for me, and all for free. I love it, especially with summer coming and more time at the beach and at the park and just outside with Keegan. Plus with a week of camping at the beach coming up, I am definitely going to need some reading material for the "me" that I'm hoping to have.

So, I'm throwing a question out to all of my readers (that's right all 6 or so of you)...what's on your nightstand? What are you currently reading, or what have you recently read that you would recommend? I'm up for anything and everything, so send them all.

And I Would Walk 500 Miles....

2008-05-02T22:53:00.000-07:00

Well, okay, not really, because let's be honest....500 miles is a really long way to walk, but it brings up something that has made me wonder lately.

Just a little background before I get to the main point of this post. The Focus has been out of commission for a few days...actually, 10 or so to be exact and it has been a good practice run on whether AJ and I could really just be a one car family or not. I think that the past week has shown that for now, we really aren't cut out to be just a one car family...mostly because AJ is nowhere near being on a regular schedule, and it's really hard to wake up a sleepy little 15-month old at 6:45 in the morning to take his dada to work, drive to the doctor's where he got 2 shots and a TB test and then drive back to work to give the car back to dad, who had to drive to the hospital for a couple of surgeries. Needless to say, until AJ has a strictly 9 to 5-type schedule we will have to keep both cars running as best we can (thank goodness for a father-in-law who was a mechanic for who knows how many years, specializing up until recently in Ford's exclusively). But I digress...

After a few days of not having a car I was going a little stir crazy, and I had some errands that I needed to run which I had put off for quite some time. More specifically, I had to go shopping at WalMart, which has to be one of my least favorite stores to go to. I'd so much rather shop at Target, but since they have torn down the old Target that was literally just up the street from us, in order to put in a much larger and better Target that will open in October, I had to go to WalMart. Not wanting to take the car from AJ (since he had hospital cases and I really didn't want to just have it for the morning and then have to go back to his work in the afternoon) and feeling particularly "exercisey" the other day, I decided that it wouldn't be a big deal for Keegan and I to make the 6-mile round trip trek from our house to WalMart. I mean, Keegan would be outside, I would have a chance to get in some much needed exercise and I'd get my shopping done. Yeah, right...best laid plans and all, right?

To be honest...it really wasn't that bad of a walk. It actually was good to break up the trip and have a little "downtime" halfway through while I meandered through the store, not because I needed to, but because the weather decided to be lame and drop 40 degrees from Sunday to Wednesday and it had started to mist right as we got to WalMart and I wasn't about to walk back home in the rain (thankfully, there was no rain). Plus, on the way there I was able to stop by our library and return our library books (there is a whole other post about how I have rediscovered the joy of borrowing books from the library...so start thinking of book recommendations...I need some new reading material, people).

Anyway, as I continue to digress..the whole reason for this post was not to talk about how I walked 6 miles, or the crazy weather we have had, but to discuss the stigma that seems to be associated with walking anywhere simply for the purpose of walking. I mean, people walk for exercise and it's not a big deal, and yet it seems to me at least that if you willingly choose to walk to the store/park/library/anywhere instead of getting into your car and driving there, you must have something wrong with you. When did this all change?

We used to walk everywhere when I was younger...or at least that's what it seemed like to me. I mean, the kids that I know of now wouldn't be caught dead walking to school and yet, that's what we always did. The only reason why we didn't walk to high school was because it was too far away...but we were only driven to elementary school and middle school when it rained. Other than that, we had to walk (remember cutting through those orange trees on occasion?). When I went up to BYU-Idaho we walked everywhere, including the grocery store (because there was a nice store that would deliver your groceries for free so that you didn't have to lug them home) and it wasn't a big deal. We were all college students and that's just what you did. And then suddenly it changed...and maybe it just changed because I no longer lived close to where I was going to school, but suddenly it wasn't ok to walk to where I needed to go. Is it just me? Is it just because I happen to live in an area where things are so spread out, or unsafe that walking isn't an option anymore? Do people really look at a pregnant woman, pushing a stroller up the street and think "Oh, how sad, she is too poor to afford a car and has to walk", or do they think "Hey, good for her, she's getting exercise and saving gas." Granted, it's the first (and probably last time for now, at least) time that I will walk to WalMart, but it's not the first time that I have walked to where I needed to run my errands rather than getting in the car and driving. I mean, the library is literally a mile away. There is a Ralph's, a Von's, a Henry's, a Long's, and come October, a Target no more than a mile and a half away. There is a Jamba Juice, a Michael's, a CVS pharmacy, a movie theatre and a Marshall's no more than 3 miles round trip from my house, and I have walked to all of them. Keegan does great in his stroller (both his single and now his double that we now have in preparation for the arrival of Jelly Bean #2), and Jamba Juice is a great treat for both of us when I decide to walk and make the trek there.

I hate that there seems to be such a stigma attached to having to walk. I don't want my kids growing up and thinking that you have to drive everywhere. Honestly, once we no longer have church at 9 a.m., I want to start walking to church on occasion, especially since it is only 1.7 miles away (just over 3 miles total). I think it would be a great break from driving, and it's a great way to save money if the gas prices keep going up like they say that they will, and I can't think of a better way to help me get the post-baby weight off. That's how a lady in my ward lost all of her weight after she had twins, so why can't I do the same thing? And while I can't promise that I will make it every week, I am certainly going to try my hardest to make sure we walk at least once or twice a month.

I mean, if we lived in New York, or pretty much anywhere in Europe, it would be weird for us to not be walking. People can't usually afford the luxury of one car, let alone 2 in those places. I've been through parts of Europe and they have such wonderful public transportation there really isn't a need to have a car, and nobody cares if you are riding the bus or not. So why is it such a weird thing here? Why do so many people think that it's "horrible" if you have to take the bus? or am I the only one that seems to think people seem ashamed of having to wait for a bus (and am I just projecting how I would feel if people saw me waiting at a bus stop?). Is it just a California-type stigma, or do you deal with it where you live too?

*That having been said...I am grateful that I now have my car back...mainly so that Keegan and I can now go to the zoo again, and the beach, and Sea World, and the pool because those places really are just way too far to walk.

Summer Lovin'

2008-04-24T12:39:00.001-07:00

While it's not really summer yet, per se, it's been beautiful enough weather as of late to warrent the title. I was going through Keegan's baby book yesterday, trying to update it as best I could, and I realized that it doesn't really have places for those in between ages of life. It covers the major milestones, meaning their birthday each year, but doesn't really cover all the months in between, so why not document and catalog things on my blog, right?

So, here's a few things that Keegan just happens to be loving right now (and who knows when that will change):

Fresh strawberries, by the bowlful. We seriously go through a 4 pound container from Costco every 3-4 days. Good thing they sell them so cheap (and good thing Keegan hasn't reacted to them since that first time. Here's hoping this means he's really not allergic to them, because he does love them so. I think he might love them more than his frozen blueberries).

Peanut Butter...and by the spoonfuls, I might add. Granted, when mom gives it to him, it's using his toddler spoons, which really aren't all that big, but with dad it's a whole other story. He so did not get this love from his mom...it's definitely from his dad, but at least I know he's getting some sort of protein, and while I'm partial to Skippy Creamy, since that's what I was raised with, AJ was given some Jif for a gag gift, which means that's what he's been getting for the last few months. Skippy will be returning to our cupboard shortly.

Mini-marshmallows....oh my goodness does he love these, but right now it's the only way we have gotten him to sit still long enough to let us cut his hair (granted it's been a very long 2 week process, but we'll take it). I have a feeling these will be a staple in this household until I have no children left running around in diapers. Thankfully, they aren't all that expensive (at least not when you buy the generic brand from the store).

His Daddy...and anything having to do with him (and yes, that really is a picture of AJ surfing). He wakes up saying "Dada", he "calls" his Dada about 20 times a day, either from my cell phone or from his play cell phone and he is constantly looking out the door waiting to see if his dada is home yet, but I'm not jealous...at least not too much. I'd be happy if he would just say "Mama" every once in a while.

Teething Tablets...ok, so maybe these are more mom and dad's favorite thing right now, but when you have 4 molars that decide to break through within days of each other, these little beauties quickly become EVERYONE's best friend. Thankfully, he really only needs them at night...now if they could make something to help dry up all the drool that is pouring from his mouth.

Other favorites (that I don't have pictures of):
blowing raspberries on his mommy's belly (which his little brother seems to like as well....at least he gets really active when Keegan is snuggling up to his mom to read books and blow raspberries)...sitting in his big boy chair (why this is fascinating I have no clue, especially since he HATED his regular high chair)...Kashi Cinnamon Harvest cereal (it's way better than frosted mini-wheats and a whole lot healthier)...signing and saying our latest animals, "Raf" (Giraffe, complete with hand movements) and "Elephant" (complete with the trumpeting noise) - videos of that are to come, because he's pretty stinking cute when he signs his animals...getting whip cream from the can put into his mouth (thanks to AJ, who got busted by mom, but it's pretty funny to watch)...digging in the dirt in the backyard, where he's a really great helper...his basketball and soccer ball...watching for birds from the window (and then chasing them as soon as he's put outside)...climbing into the car and then climbing up into his car seat, which has made things way easier on mom...giving great hugs and "loves" to mom and dad, which I think we appreciate way more than he does...and so much more that I can't think of right now.

Seriously, where does the time go? And what is going to change in the next 24, 48, 72 hours, let alone weeks and months? It constantly amazes me that he's already 15 months old, and all of the things that he seems to learn on a daily basis. How am I supposed to keep up with him?

The Cat's Out of the Bag....

2008-04-10T22:27:00.000-07:00

not that we were really keeping it a secret, but we did just find out Tuesday around 5 p.m. and I just haven't had a chance to get around and let everyone know what we found out. Little Jelly Bean was more than willing to cooperate and let the whole world know that he is indeed all boy (I'll spare you all the photos that the tech printed out for us). We are all excited, although Keegan doesn't really know what is going on, and looking forward to another little boy in the family. So far he's been much calmer than Keegan ever was, which means that AJ has taken to saying that this one is definitely my kid. I just like not getting beat up from the inside out like I didn't with Keegan. We'll see if that changes as he gets bigger and there is less room in my belly.

My Bump, My Bump, My Growing Baby Bump...

2008-04-09T13:09:00.000-07:00

I'm not really one for taking monthly belly photos when I'm pregnant. I did it for the first 4 months I was pregnant with Keegan and then I blew up like a balloon and realized that I really didn't want to have a physical record of how big I was getting. The memories are bad enough. I didn't need actual physical evidence of it as well. Trust me, you don't forget what it's like to gain 50 pounds in a very short period of time.

That having been said...I have taken a photo documenting my halfway point in this pregnancy (well, just shy of halfway, but close enough)...

They aren't perfect, but it's hard to take a picture with a little kid attached to your legs because he wants the camera. And we don't have a ton of mirrors in the house. Literally, just in the one working bathroom right now and on a dresser in one of the extra bedrooms. That's it (and I'm not really complaining about the for the record).

So, now you've seen the belly. Enjoy the picture now, because you probably won't see another one, at least not while I'm still pregnant (although maybe one from the hospital).

According to a lady that stopped me in Henry's the other day, she could tell what I'm having, just by the way my belly was looking (I don't necessarily agree with her, since I've heard that's really only true for the first one, but who knows). How about you...can you tell whether it's a boy or a girl? What's your guess?

Dear Life

2008-04-01T01:15:00.000-07:00

Dear Insomnia,
Please go away and actually let me rest for once. I can't do this 3-hours of sleep per night thing anymore. Really, just go away and let me count sheep, and get my beauty sleep and wake up feeling refreshed and rested the next morning. Can't you go and bother some college student who's had 5 Red Bulls in the last hour just so he/she can stay up and study/party/do whatever and leave me alone. Really, your presence in my life right now is not wanted, nor is it appreciated. I need my sleep!!!

Dear Bathroom Remodel,
Will you please just hurry up and happen? We bought a 2 bathroom home for a reason, and it's really inconvenient that currently the only usable thing in my bathroom is my toilet. Can't I just snap my fingers or wiggle my nose and have the perfect tile, the perfect vanity, the perfect window, the perfect mirror and the most fabulous dual-headed shower just magically appear in my now gutted bathroom while I am sleeping? And while you are at it, can you make the bedroom remodel happen as well? Oh, and can you find the perfect paint color for me as well, because really, pregnant women should not make decisions about paint. It's not in anybody's best interest (trust me, I learned this one the hard way).

Dear Annoying Neighbor who has decided that "mi casa es su casa",
Mi casa es MI CASA...oh yeah, and my husband is not your best friend. Please respect our personal space. Just because the garage door is open and you can see that my husband and son are playing in the backyard, this does not mean that it is an open invitation for you and your stupid little dog to join them. I'd really hate for you to get in trouble for trespassing (despite my husband's loving reminders that you are our neighbor and that I really do need to remain civil with you). Speaking of your dog, please keep him from using our lawn and our bushes as his own private bathroom, or at least have the decency to clean up after him when he does so (and don't try to deny this...our friends saw the little mutt use our bushes to relieve himself, pointed it out to you TWICE and you blatantly ignored them). AJ works really hard to keep our front yard looking nice, small as it is. We don't have the luxury of having the extra money to pay for gardeners, like you do, so RESPECT THE LAWN. Oh yeah, and when you see AJ mowing said lawn, or demoing our bathroom, leave him alone. He has work to do, and Keegan and I have limited time with him on the weekends. Every second you spend "talking" to him and butting into our personal and private lives is a second that we don't get with him, so seriously, get a life.

Dear little baby currently residing in my belly,
Please cooperate next week when we try and see if you are a boy or a girl. I really, really, really want to know, so that I can truly start preparing for your arrival this summer. And while we are at it, will you please stop moving around at 3 a.m. ? Granted, I'm aware that with the current insomnia that I'm dealing with, I'm already awake, so you aren't really doing that much harm, but I really would like it if you were a little more active during the daylight hours and a little less so during the nighttime ones. Oh yeah...and no more kicking your older brother when he happens to be snuggling with me before he finally drifts off into dreamland. Yes, I know that he can't feel it at the moment, but it's not going to be that way forever. Besides, I've stopped him from patting you through my belly, so now it's your turn to cooperate. You'll have plenty of time to torment him once you are born.

Dear pregnancy weight gain,
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE do not turn into 50 pounds like my last pregnancy. Truth be told, I'd really like to keep it to no more than half that this time around. It's going to be hot this summer, and I really don't want to be dragging around 50 extra pounds to the beach and pool. I'm already going to look like a beached whale, so help a sister out will ya? And once this little baby is born, please promptly remove yourself from my premises. I'll have a hard enough time getting rid of the leftover weight from pregnancy #1, and I really don't want any extra baggage from you.

Dear crazy pregnancy dreams,
Please see above note to Insomnia. Your presence is no more wished for than his, so back off and leave me alone. I'm sick of dreams (when I'm actually able to sleep) about gila monsters (all because a stupid lizard took up residence in my home for a few days) and other things that just seem all to real. Just walk away and let me count some sheep, will you?

Dear family who I don't get to talk to often enough,
I love you and miss you all and wish that we were closer. Val, thanks for the fabulous way of blogging and venting. It's been very therapeutic and I might be able to sleep tonight (here's hoping at least). Becky, how is the hand? Hopefully it is feeling better. Let us know if we can help in anyway. Julie, I promise I will call you tomorrow (hopefully before you even see this), and for that matter, I promise to call all of you soon. Really, I need to catch up on all of your lives.

Dear friends,
Ditto to all that I said to my family. I really am trying to be better about keeping in touch and returning phone calls and emails, and I'm well aware that I still have a long way to go.

"There is a house, a napping house...

2008-03-09T13:37:00.000-07:00

where everyone is sleeping."* Everyone but mom that is. And why can't mom sleep? Oh yeah, that's right, she's pregnant and uncomfortable (seriously, I don't remember it starting this early with Keegan, but I for sure can't sleep very well at all anymore). That and the fact that I went to bed with a headache last night, woke up with a migraine about 4 this morning and since all I can take is Tylenol, ended up staying home from church while waiting for the migraine to go away (which mostly involved tossing and turning and catching little bits of sleep all morning) until AJ and Keegan got home from church about 12:30. Now they are both settled down for their Sunday afternoon naps (yes, AJ still naps on Sundays...it's one of his small pleasures in life) and I'm awake...and blogging of course! :) All while enjoying the beautiful cool, summery breeze that is coming through all the open windows in the house. If I haven't mentioned it before, let me mention it now....I LOVE living in San Diego.

On a side note...Keegan is sleeping like a teenager again...seriously, AJ had to wake him up this morning to get him ready for church (so not the usual course of things). It was pretty funny to watch too...AJ went in and opened his curtains so that his room was bright and cheery and then left his door open so that he could hear all the noise going on throughout the house, and still Keegan snored on (he was laying on his back, one arm draped over his eyes, sawing some serious logs). Oh that little boy makes me laugh....he is such a joy to have around. The snoring was more a result of the cold that he's been fighting off...but still, it was pretty funny to listen too. At least they haven't reached grizzly bear proportions yet, although I'm sure that will happen eventually.

*the first line of one of my favorite books "The Napping House"...seriously, you should all read it. It's beautifully illustrated too! :)

Sunshiney Day

2008-02-26T14:59:00.000-08:00

Whomever was praying for sun and warm weather in CA, I would just like to say THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!! Seriously, after having rain off and on for the past week or so, the drastic change to sunshine and 70 degree weather has been FABULOUS. Keegan especially has been enjoying it (granted he loves any weather, but when it's this sunny he knows there is no way I can say no to going outside). I wish that I had taken pictures of him from Saturday after he spent an hour "helping" his dad plant our avocado tree, but unfortunately I was laughing too hard to remember the camera and all I could think about was getting my muddy baby washed off before he tracked half of the dirt from our backyard into the house. I guess that's what I get for wanting an hour to go and get a pedicure and have some "me" time and for leaving Keegan with his dad unsupervised. Needless to say it was an hour well-spent digging in the dirt and riding around in the wheelbarrow, if you ask AJ and Keegan.

These pictures were taken today after I let Keegan out into the backyard to play for a while before I dragged him hither and yon while I ran some errands this afternoon. The hose has become one of his favorite toys to play with, topped only by the squirt bottle, which he has become a MENACE with (just ask his Grandma Leach). He'll squirt you, giggle and laugh hysterically and then run away, waiting for you to chase him. It's pretty entertaining...and totally his dad's fault, since AJ introduced him to the squirt bottle to begin with. I have to admit, little boys are seriously THE BEST!!!

* sorry these are blurry, but it's hard to get a little boy in motion to stop and wait for the camera to take a picture.

I think it's time to get Keegan a sandbox to play in...or something he can dig in the dirt with other than his hands.

Birthday Re-Cap

2008-02-04T10:02:00.000-08:00

I realized that I have become a lazy blogger...and poor Keegan is suffering for it. Especially since this is really the only record I have of the major milestones and events in his life (since I'm slacking on updating his baby book).

Keegan's 1st birthday was a very small event. For his actual birthday I took him to the zoo (one of his all-time favorite places to be). It was actually quite nice there that day. Not too crowded and not too cold. We had lunch at Wendy's (that we took to the zoo) and he got to enjoy his very own ORIGINAL Frosty (who wants a vanilla one? I mean really...why mess with something that's already perfect?). After the zoo, we came home and just had a quiet night with dad. Nothing too big...which was probably good, seeing as how Keegan took it upon himself to "celebrate" his birthday by coming down with a cold and only letting mom and dad get about 5 hours of sleep Friday night.

We had a small family party for him on Saturday. I mean really small...as in, just my mom and dad, AJ's parents, his Aunt and Uncle and his sister and her daughter. That was it, which was good, because after the rough night that we had had, I don't think we could have handled much more than that. It didn't help that I started to come down with the same cold that Keegan had that day either. Since he wasn't feeling all that great, Keegan wasn't too sure what to think about his cupcake (although he enjoyed the frosting..and liked the cupcakes later in the week). He just wasn't feeling it for his birthday. i don't have pictures of us blowing out his candle, but I'm pretty sure either my mom might have one, or AJ's aunt since she's really good about getting pictures of everything.

Here are a few pics from the "celebration":

Happy Birthday Munchkin Man

2008-01-25T09:25:00.000-08:00

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

I know this is a little long, but I had a hard time deciding what pictures to use. I can't believe that he is 1 already, but I can't wait for the rest of his life!

Happy Birthday little man. I love you!

Christmas Catch-Up

2008-01-23T11:19:00.000-08:00

So I'm finally getting caught up on my Christmas posts. Granted, it's been almost a month, which is why there are going to be more pictures than words, but at least I'm getting the pictures up.

Yes, most of the presents under that tree are Keegan's. What can I say, he got a little spoiled. Hence why his birthday celebration is going to be SUPER SMALL.
Not one to rip big pieces of wrapping paper. Oh no, my little boy would only rip off small pieces and then he shook his hands until the paper and tape came off. He doesn't like anything sticking to his hands. It's kind of funny. I'm loving his hair in this picture too. So "I just rolled out of bed".

Apparently opening presents is hard work, so Keegan had to take a brief water break.

Mom and Dad's present from the kids, hung-up on the wall and everything. They loved it. Cynth, it was a great idea. Mom said it was a nice reminder of how marriage is for eternity.
Playing with the toys Christmas morning. Yes, Keegan is the only one who is dressed at this point. The rest of us were a little bit lazy.
Wishing the camera would just go away.
Wearing Grandpa's new hat from Emily. I love the string hanging down in the middle of the forehead.

The funny thing about this photo is that neither AJ nor I went to BYU...although since everyone else in my family has gone there, including my mom and dad, it's somewhat appropriate that he's wearing this hat. Especially since AJ and I are totally fine with Keegan going there someday (I know, I know...go figure, but we both agree it's a great environment).

Great Expectations

2008-01-15T18:44:00.000-08:00

AJ and I are once again entering a phase in our lives where time is measured in weeks and trimesters, instead of hours and days. Where my body is once again no longer mine alone...and where we will be adding TWO feet to our home this summer. That's right...we're pregnant!!! We will soon be adding another little "jelly bean" to our family (and for the record, I really did have the flu a few weeks back..it wasn't me just hiding morning sickness or anything like that, I promise. The morning sickness just decided to show up right after I got the flu and it has decided to stick around for a little while. SO NOT FUN!!!).

Despite my saying that I would not get pregnant again until I had lost all of my baby weight from Keegan (yeah....who knows if that will ever happen), I am once again pregnant. Seven weeks and five days along to be exact, and while it's somewhat overwhelming, and sort of crazy, I guess you can't really tell the Lord "No" when he sends you the prompting that it is once again "the right time." He knows better than anyone whether or not we can handle it, and we really are excited for this new little addition to our small family.

So here's the latest addition to the Durfee clan: *Not the greatest picture I know, but unfortunately my scanner isn't compatible with my laptop, and my digital camera kind of sucks.

So, mark your calendars for Aug. 29th, which is when they say this little guy or gal will make their world debut. We can't wait! (and if any of you out there have some tried and true morning (afternoon and evening) sickness remedies, drop me a line. They would be MUCH appreciated).

And I'm Back....

2008-01-15T11:30:00.000-08:00

I feel like it's been ages and now I have a ton of catching up to do. Christmas posts will be coming shortly (yes, I know it's now the 15th of January...what can I say, I'm slacking a little) but I have to download photos onto the computer first and then figure out how to download video as well (that's what I get for not ever reading the user manual on anything), then I've got Keegan's birthday coming up soon (how can he only be 10 days away from turning 1???? Where did the last year go? I vividly remember what I was doing this time last year and it scares me how quickly things change). I'm working on something special for that...although I do need to get some videos downloaded to help finish my project, so we'll see if it actually gets done. But for now, I'll work on actually writing down my resolutions for the new year in hopes that I can stick with them and accomplish something positive this year.

So here they are...in no particular order (and you can check back with me in a year to see how well I've done):

1. This year I will be less critical of myself. I need to learn to love who I am...post-baby body and all, and then work on changing the things that I have control to change.
2.This year, I'm going to make sure that I spend a lot of quality time with Keegan so that he will never have a chance to doubt just how much I love him. I will continue to rock him to sleep each night as we hum songs together. That way we still have the closeness that we had while nursing even though he decided to wean himself at 10 1/2 months old.
3. This year, I will spend more quality time with my husband. We've both actually resolved to make date night a part of our lives again. We were doing really well until I was about 6 months pregnant. I miss just talking to him and having time alone with him without Keegan being there as well.
4. This year, I will improve my relationship with my Heavenly Father. I've let some things slack over the past year and I need to make sure that I don't get too complacent with my spirituality and my relationship with my Heavenly Father and with my savior, Jesus Christ. I will study my scriptures more. I will make sure to have daily, personal conversations with Him, and share all of my burdens with him, so that he can help me with all of my shortcomings. I want my son (and any future children) to know that I have a personal relationship with my Heavenly Father.
5. This year, I will read more. I will use my library card to the hilt and make sure that I get books both for myself and for my son. I will read fun and frivolous books as well as books that educate, enlighten and improve my mind and my personal self.
6. This year, I will learn to let things go. I can be stubborn...and I can hold onto things for a really long time. This year, I'm going to work on just letting things go, and not taking things so personally all of the time.
7. This year, I will be a better housekeeper. I will take care of our home, and truly make it a place that AJ and I can be proud of. But I promise that I won't let it consume me...and take me away from the really important things in life.
8. This year, I will keep in touch with my family and friends way better than I have been lately. I'm a horrible corresponder. I take forever to call people back and I hate that there have been times when months have gone by before I manage to get back in touch with some of my closest friends. Each person in my life has helped make me who I am, and I want to be better at showing them how much I appreciate the impact that they have had on my life.

To my loved ones, near and far...

2008-01-03T18:44:00.000-08:00

if you haven't done it yet, I strongly encourage all of you to GET YOUR FLU SHOT!!

Seriously, don't delay.

*The previous public service announcement was brought to you by Shauna who is currently sitting on the couch after 15+ hours of puking her guts out (seriously, I think all of my major organs have now been flushed down my toilet), 2 IV bags and finally keeping some ginger ale in her very upset little belly. AJ is the bestess husband ever (he so hooked it up with the IV bags - although he swears that it's not the flu but actually food poisoning, which if it is...DON'T EAT AT RUBIOS) as he has had to pretty much take over caring for Keegan right now, along with still having to go to work today...and for calling his mom to come and watch Keegan so I could get said IV bags without towing the little munchkin along. Oh yeah...and seriously, thank HEAVEN for little boys who seem to have picked up on the fact that mommy isn't feeling well and has therefore showered me with numerous hugs and kisses as well as happily playing by himself for most of the day (and who only tried to shaghai my ginger ale once).

Normal blogging programming will resume when I can keep more than just ginger ale in me...I have some serious catching up to do with Christmas and New Year's and my resolutions for the upcoming year.

Love you all and HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Looking Back on the Year That Was

2007-12-23T12:18:00.000-08:00

I actually meant to get this post up on the 21st, but with having to finish up my Christmas shopping and running errands to help AJ out with his secret santa gifts for work the days just went by a whole lot quicker than I had planned.

This time last year AJ and I were moving and settling into our house. It's hard to believe that it's been a year already (seriously - where does the time go?). We closed on our house at 4:30 on Dec. 21st and then I picked up the keys the morning of the 22nd (from the shadiest real estate agent I have ever known). It was so completely overwhelming at the time to think of ourselves as homeowners...and I guess if I'm being completely honest, it still is an overwhelming feeling. We joked at the time that this was our Christmas gift to each other for the next 30 years (yeah, there's a lot of truth to that statement). I was as big as a house (literally) and really frustrated with how little I could actually help with the whole moving process. My sister Val was a rock star and made sure that we were packed and ready to actually move in...not to mention helping me paint Keegan's room, along with painting his bathroom all on her own (and yes I painted even though I was only a month away from delivering) and the members of our ward we totally amazing. The youth helped paint our bedroom and they had us moved and ready to go in no time a few days later.

Home ownership brings a whole new set of worries, problems and issues that we never had renting. There's also a whole lot more stress over plumbing problems and utility bills and mortgage payments, but it's pretty rewarding as well. I recognize that AJ and I are pretty lucky even owning a home at this particular stage in our life, and we feel really blessed that we were lucky enough to even get into a house, let alone one that is as big as ours is and in San Diego nonetheless.

I looked for pictures of our house from when we were moving in and I couldn't find any (I think my sister Val has them somewhere since she was really the only one who had the foresight to take pictures). Not too much has changed from when we moved in...there's a little bit more furniture now, and some of the windows have changed, but essentially it's just like the day we moved in...and yet there's a different feeling to the house every time I walk through the door. Maybe it's because there is more furniture, or because there aren't boxes everywhere, or because we now have a year's worth of memories, good and bad, to look back on...but the house just isn't a house anymore. It's our HOME, and I have to admit...it's pretty amazing.

Let's Go Surfin' Now...

2007-12-06T12:07:00.000-08:00

While the rest of the country deals with snow, floods, rain and ice, San Diego gears up for MASSIVELY BIG SURF. I'm talking HUGE...like 12+ feet waves. The funniest thing about this...people don't get scared about the waves. They get excited for it. Granted, they board up windows if necessary and put up sandbags, etc., but the beach is almost as crowded when the surf is huge as it is on a warm and balmy summer day. Seriously...people love this stuff. So, I figured I would go and check what it was all about (and get Keegan out of the house while I was at it)...and take some pictures to document it while we were there.

If you look really closely at the top of the following picture you will see a bunch of surfers out in the water (no AJ isn't one of them...although he did go out earlier in the morning with our bishop). I personally thought they were all nuts, but I guess with the lifeguards in a boat right in the middle of them all they figured that they were relatively safe.

Most of the day was actually beautiful and sunny and clear, but towards the end of our little walk the mist and the fog started rolling in. It was actually kind of pretty.

Welcome to winter in San Diego!!